The SHOOT Project presents
TRAINING DAY
:-Atlanta, Georgia-:

EARLIER THIS WEEK:

{Daniel Jones is, seated at his desk, talking on the phone.}

Daniel Jones: The buy rate should be great; we have some interesting
match-ups.

{Someone knocks on the door.}

Daniel Jones (CONT'D): (To the door)  Come in. (Back to the person on the
phone)  Nah, I think we are the first to add fire to a casket match.

{Ben "The Blackout" Jackman walks in.  Jones sticks one finger up in the
air, directing Jackman to wait one moment.  Jackman shifts impatiently on
his feet.}

Daniel Jones (CONT'D): Oh, what the fire Marshall does not know will not
kill him.  Yes. Bye.

{Jones hangs up the phone.}

Daniel Jones (CONT'D): Yes Jackman,

Ben Jackman: I have a complaint about my booking for Training Day.

{Jones laughs.}

Daniel Jones: Ah yes, the Barnyard Brawl with Joking John Jinx.

Ben Jackman: Yeah, that.  You see, I am a serious wrestler.

{Jones's eyes gloss over.  It is obvious he does not care whatsoever.}

Ben Jackman (CONT'D): I am a future main eventer in my opinion and you are
booking me in another match with that fucking psychopath.  In Arkansas no
less,

Daniel Jones: The possibilities for entertainment are endless.

Ben Jackman: He is going to be in his element with all those barnyard
animals.  And what was that you said about cannibals?

Daniel Jones: (Serious)  Grits do something awful to people. (Beat)  Now get
out of here before I add a stipulation like you must wear a burlap sack over
your head!

{Jackman glares at Daniel Jones, who does not care one bit, and storms out
of the office.}

CUT, TO:

EARLIER TODAY

{Joking John Jinx is smiling.  Sitting in front of him is a bald, thin, wan
man in dirty jeans.  He is not wearing a shirt.}

Joking John Jinx: So is it a deal my friend?

Man: (Stuttering in a southern drawl)  Y-y-yes b-but only I-if I get
chick-chick-chick

Joking John Jinx: Yes, chicken heads. (Laughs wildly)  all you can eat
buffet!

CUT, TO:

PRESENT TIME

INT. ATLANTA GEORGIA   NIGHT

{The shot is off the announcers.  They both look sketched out.}

John: I do not even want to know

James:  So folks, welcome to  Training Day ! Tonight, we are live from
Atlanta, Georgia and what an incredible night we have lined up for you! Tell
them John.

John: Damn, why does the pay per view s always get the good stuff? James,
tonight, we have the Barnyard Brawl match, the Extreme Limits match, the
Birdcage match  and who could forget the main-event  SKULL V. JOSH JOHNSON
 AGAIN  FOR THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE', best yet, it is in a two out of
three falls stipulation  *Growls*  with that evil bitch, Dark Krystal, as
the special referee. You know, I bet you Josh and Jason set that up!

James: I would not be surprised. Let us get on with our first match.

Smelly Loser Match
Amorphous v. Simon Stone

James: Up first, we have Amorphous and Simon Stone squaring off.

John: It is another Smelly Loser Match. This should be interesting.

James:  another one, we have not had the first one!

John: Ha, yeah, thanks to Josh Johnson. For once he done something right.

{ Fuck me, Fuck me, I am one stupid Fuck me!  by the SHOOT Project Creative
Team blare over the pa speakers. Amorphous makes his way down to the ring
and warms himself up while awaiting his opponent.}

Ring Announcer, Samantha Coil: Introducing first in our opening contest,
AMORPHOUS!

{ Give me a break. I just woke up!  by the SHOOT Project Whatever Team blare
over the pa speakers. Simon Stone makes his way down to the ring and warms
himself up before the bell  interesting.}

Jon: Looks like Stone's ready for a fight.

James: Well he just does not want to be the  Smelly Loser .
John: Stone slides into the ring while Amorphous is still warming up. Stone
runs over and gives Amorphous a dropkick throwing him to the outside of the
ring.

James: What, the hell is he looking for?

John: Amorphous lifts the ring apron and reaches underneath for something.
He comes up with a crowbar. What a second  a crowbar, what, the hell...This
reminds me of the Old Shoot.

James: Yeah there's no weapons allowed in this match.

John: Well outside the ring, anything is legal.

James: Amorphous hits Stone with the crowbar repeatedly as he comes out
after him.  Amorphous picks up the hurting Stone and locks in a side
headlock.  Stone extends his left arm over the back of Amorphous and
attempts to pull his hair, but he tightened the hold and Amorphous let his
arm fall.

James: Get back in the ring already!

John:  Amorphous lets go of Stone and rolls him in the ring. I think he
heard you.

James: It is about damn time.

John: Stone grabs Amorphous and snap-mares him down then followed up with a
leg drop to the fallen Amorphous and locked in a sleeper hold for good
measure. The ref checks on the hold to make sure it was legal then checked
on Amorphous

James: We could have a winner here

John: Stone holds the sleeper hold as tight as he can. But Amorphous reaches
his feet and pushes Stone back into the ropes. When Stone comes back at him,
Amorphous clotheslines Stone to the ground.

James: Stone quickly gets back to his feet only to be, knocked back down by
a running lariat. Stone gets up again, but slowly. Amorphous tries his luck
once more with another clothesline but proves to be too much. Stone executes
a drop toehold.

John:  OH SHIT, that has to hurt!

James: On his way down to the mat, Amorphous hits his face on the bottom
turnbuckle. Knocking him out cold, Stone drags him to the center of the ring
and goes for the three counts

One
Two
Three

{ Give me a break. I just woke up!  by the SHOOT Project Whatever Team blare
over the pa speakers as Simon Stone exits the ring, leaving Amorphous
behind.}

James: Ladies and Gentlemen, Amorphous is the smelly looser!

John:  Oh, how exciting, Daniel Jones new attempts at ratings folks. Get
used to it.

CUT, TO:

INT. BACKSTAGE FOOTAGE

{The cameras cut backstage where you see Jeff Cross and Skull walking down
the hall towards the Conspirators locker room. They walk in. The room is
dark, quiet, and a candle is, lit on a wooden table. Rancid approaches
them }

Rancid: He has not said anything since his last promo.

Skull: We need to talk to him

Rancid: That would not be very wise

{Skull ignores Rancid completely and walks over to a dark corner, where
Sebastian Crow sits quietly, motionless.}

Skull: Sebastian, we need to talk

Jeff Cross: Look Sebastian, it has been fun running with you and the
Conspirators

Skull: But it is bringing much too heat on us man.

Jeff Cross: With Shoot coming back to the states, it is risky enough for us
to stick around. But with all we have been doing as Conspirators

Skull: We have been drawing too much heat from the cops. I have nearly, been
picked up in every city for the past two weeks now. I could not even fly out
of Idaho without cops trying to pick me up.

Jeff Cross: We hate to have to do this, but we have no choice.

Skull: But we are not turning our backs on you or Rancid.

Jeff Cross: We will be like the fourth amigo. 'Or like Howling Mad Murdock
from the A-team.

Skull: Yeah we cannot run with you two anymore, but when you really need us,
we will be there. Just cannot be apart of it since we bring so much heat
into the headlines.

Jeff Cross: We do that enough on our own as it is.

Skull: If you ever really need anything, you have my cell number.

Jeff Cross: Who knows, maybe after a few weeks when things calm down we can
run with yaw again.

{Sebastian stayed silent. His eyes did not move, his fingers did not twitch
Skull and Jeff Cross looked at each other, then back at Rancid.}

Rancid: Maybe you should leave

{Skull nods his head in agreement.}

Skull:  yeah, takes care Sebastian

{Skull and Jeff exit. Zoom in on Sebastian s face.}

Sebastian Crow:  maybe, just maybe,

CUT, TO:

RINGSIDE FOOTAGE

Four-way Rookie Match
Danny Collins v. the Limey v. Diamond Del Carver v. Dark Krystal

John: Fans let us prepare for our opening match!

James: John, would this not be our second match?

John: Oh yeah, prepare for our second match! Let us keep things moving. We
have one hell of a night to prepare for.

James: Right on,

{ Mighty Mouse  from the Cartoon Network blares over the pa speakers as
Danny Collins walks to the ring.}

Ring Announcer, Samantha Coil: Introducing first in our four-way rookie
match  DANNY COLLINS!

James: Danny Collins has shown us some huge talent since his debut

John: Has anybody seen the porn?

{ Soap and Suds  by the SHOOT Project Shower-For-Sick-Twisted-Freaks blares
over the pa speakers as the Limey walks to the ring.}

Ring Announcer, Samantha Coil: Introducing second in our four-way rookie
match  the LIMEY!

James: Whatever happened to the Limey?

John: I do not know. But I think he might be perfect for our Smelly Loser
Championship.

James: That is a good idea. Keep that in mind, John.

John: Gee, thanks  (He blushes)  by the way, have you seen the porn?

{ Diamonds are for ladies. Rubies are for men  by the SHOOT Project blares
over the pa speakers as Diamond Del Carver walks to the ring.}

Ring Announcer, Samantha Coil: Introducing third in our four-way rookie
match, DIAMOND DEL CARVER!

James: Diamond Del Carver is a newbie to the SHOOT Project. This will be his
debut match.

John: Why, that is cool. Who cares! Where is the porn?

{ Living Dead Girl  by Rob Zombie blares over the pa speakers as Dark
Krystal walks to the ring.}

Ring Announcer, Samantha Coil: Introducing third in our four-way rookie
match, DARK KRYSTAL!

James: Dark is another rookie the executive board seems fond of.

John: Whoa, do I recall her being a playboy model for Jim Henson Productions
once?

{James looks at John odd.}

John:  her name sounds rather familiar.

James:  right. You are just stuck on porn tonight, are you not!

John:  yes. Forgive me. OH, LOOK, THE NEW EDITION OF

{James coughs, signaling for John to shush.}

John:  oh right, on with the match. Damn, Miss Piggy is on the cover too

**Ding, Ding, Ding**

James: Okay, well, the bell has sounded and we are ready to go. Here is how
things will go, as it says on our pamphlets for this evening. *Clears his
throat*  the four-way rookie match will be based around four rookies of
SHOOT. Two will start out, while the rest wait behind a turnbuckle. They can
participate when one of the two tags out, which means they can tag to
anybody as long as they are in the match. Pretty much, this is like a
four-way elimination match, tight.

John: Yeah, that is tight. Let us get with things here. Del Carver and
Collins start things off here. They circle the ring, now they tie up, and
Carver whips Collins to the ropes. Collins comes back and goes for a
clothesline, but Carver lifts Collins up, hitting him with a sidewalk slam.

James: Del Carver goes for an early cover

One
Kick out

John: Apparently Carver has never wrestled

James: I am sure he has if he knew that move! Del Carver brings Collins back
to his feet and tags out, bringing in the Limey. The Limey jumps in and
takes control of Collins, hitting a chop across his chest, but Collins
reverses it and sends the Limey into a turnbuckle. Collins starts sending
continuous right punches to the face of the Limey! He follows it up with a
snap-mare, followed by a kick to the back, and a falling elbow.

John: Ah, he points to the audience and they go wild! What a cheap show-off!

James: John, I would not be surprised if this man is, placed in a title
match next Sunday. Daniel Jones, from my understanding, is signing everybody
to fight for vacant titles.

John: That would be cool. Since we finally have this Triad shit over, with.
We need some new excitement.

James: I agree. Danny Collins scoops up the Limey and hits him with a power
slam, followed by a leg-drop to the throat  there is the cover

One
Two
Kick out

John: What is it with these people tonight? Have they not learned ANYTHING
from wrestling school?

James: Danny Collins tags out, bringing in Dark

John: Oh great, Jim Henson Enterprises, play with my MUPPET will you

James:  John,

John:  yes,

James: Stop with the corny jokes, will you.

John: But I thought they were funny!

James: No, they are annoying. Stop it.

John:  man, thanks for the gratitude.

James: No problem , the Limey charges for Dark and swings with a
clothesline, Dark ducks and the Limey swings again. She ducks again.

John: How cute! It looks as if these two are square dancing.

James: The Limey charges for Dark once more, Dark ducks, and she begins
hitting the Limey with right punches to the face. She backs the Limey
against the ropes

John:  where did she learn how to wrestle? *Shouts*  HEY, NO GIRLS ALLOWED
BIMBO!

James:  the Limey comes back and  the KRYSTAL KUTTER!

John: *Stoops down*  that looked pretty, nice

One
Two
Three

**Ding, Ding, Ding**

Eliminated: The Limey

James: Dark is our first actual skilled female wrestler in SHOOT. I see her
future going far.

John:  yes, I agree. Now Danny Collins is back in the ring and she sphere(s)
him back down! There is a tag out. Now we bring in Diamond Del Carver.

James: Diamond Del Carver brings Collins back to his feet. These two fought
at the beginning of the match-up. Collins pushes back Carver and hits him
with continuous blows to the face. Collins goes for an Irish whip, Del
Carver reverses it, Collins reverses it, and he sends Carver into the
turnbuckle with a hard clothesline to the throat. Now Collins is kicking the
hell out of Carver s gut-area.

John: A boot to the throat follows after. The referee starts the count; he
tries to make Collins break the hold

One
Two
Three
Four

James: He does. But Collins does not quit. He climbs the turnbuckle and
starts the ten-punch count

One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten

James: Collins steps down, he turns his back to Carver  one-split-second,
and Collins is down with a POWERFUL clothesline from Carver! Carver goes for
the cover

One
Two
Kick out

John: Ha, look at Dark, James. She is standing over there like a good girl.
She is not expecting to get into any fights anytime soon.

James:  oh, she will! Dark is not a complete  good girl  you know. She can
be seriously aggressive when it comes to competing in matches. Trust me; I
have watched this girl work.

John: IN A PORNO,

James:  you know what I mean John.

John: Yeah, yeah, I still think she belongs in the kitchen though. Fix us
men some dinner, BITCH!

James:  you know she is going to watch this later.

John:  damn. Speaking of which, she is also the special guest referee in our
main event tonight!

James: That will be a sight to see. In the ring, Collins reverses a standing
sleeper-hold, he knees Carver hard in the back, and they go down to the mat
Collins goes for a sleeper-hold

John:  oh, this is good

James: Danny Collins has Del Carver locked in tight! He is putting him to
sleep, now only if the referee can count a three-fall. Del Carver will be,
eliminated from this match-up!

One

John: The referee has one! James, did you see that? The referee has one!

James: I saw that John.

Two

John: The referee has two! James, did you see that? The referee has two!

James: You are like a child; do you know that?

John: Eh, I just like annoying you.

James: I could tell that a long time ago! What else is new? There is a hold
on the count for some reason  no, wait, the referee brings up Del Carver s
arm and  HE KEPT IT UP! HE KEPT IT UP! Danny Carver  errs  Del Carver grabs
a-hold of Danny Collins and hits him with a snap-mare!

John: Danny Collins charges for Del Carver, Del ducks, and lifts Collins up
for a Vertical suplex  NO, HE SLAMS COLLINS HEAD TO THE MAT! There is a
cover!

One
Two
Three

**Ding, Ding, Ding**

Eliminated: Danny Collins

John: Well there goes my prediction. Now it is just down to Del Carver and
 THE BIMBOLISTIC WHORE  DARK KRYSTAL  looks at that bitch, she trots into
the ring as if she is something

James: John, you appear to have a prejudice problem against female wrestlers
in SHOOT. Are you gay?

John: WHAT,

James: It was just a question.

John: *Growls*  shut up and let me call this match. Del Carver finally sees
whom he must face. Apparently, for a reason, Del has a problem with fighting
her! *Shouts*  KNOCK HER TITS OFF, CARVER!
James: I am giving Dark permission later to scrape your mouth with a steel
spatula if you do not shut up!

John:  fuck  fuck me like an animal  fuck me like an animal

James: Erg, how do I work under such PRESSURE?

John:  come on everybody , let us do the doggy!

James:  *Pause*

John:  fuck me like an animal

James:  fucking idiot, on with the match folks, forgive him. I apologize for
his acknowledged handicapped attitude.

John:  fuck me like an animal.

James: Exactly my point let us get this match over, with. We have two
contestants left. Del Carver still refuses to fight with Dark. She tempts
him, wondering why, why will you not fight a female Del!

John:  why will you not fight SHOOT(s) backstage chef Carver?

James: I find everybody to be equal here  until we find a women s division
of course.

John: Ha, there you go!

James:  a punch to Del Carvers face, Dark wants this over with as much as we
do! She wants the match to continue, no matter what sex she is!

John:  I do not think they have a sex for her. Oh, wait, yes they do. It is,
called, TRANSEXUAL!

James: John, shut the fuck up!

John:  John, shut the fuck up. Fuck me.

James: No, thank you, I will try my chances with Lassie.

John: Great James, you just admitted to animal cruelty, no wonder that show
died. On with the match folks, leave the hairball-coughing freak begging.
Dark continues to tempt Del Carver. Finally, she pushes him! And there we
go, she pushed him too far and Del Carver hit her with a hard slap! SLAP HER
DEL, SLAP THAT BITCH!

James: You are sick John.

John: Hey, if the price is right, my actions are right. Daniel Jones says
so.

James:  he is sick.

John: Cool. Now you agree. Dark and Carver go into a fighting frenzy in the
center of the ring! They grab hold of one another, trying to take each other
down, nothing works! They flip each other over the ropes and they land on
the concrete floor! Dark brings Carver back to his feet and Irish whips him
to the steel steps! She charges and  WHOA MAMA, I WANT IN THIS MATCH NOW!

James: Still that had to hurt.

John: Trust me James, when a woman charges her groin into your face, it does
not hurt!

James: Oh, I see.

John:  as if, you will ever know anything about that.

James: I am happily married, you know!

John: Whatever, Dark brings Del to his feet and slams his head into the ring
post! She continues it up, slamming his face into the guardrail; he reverses
with an uppercut chop to the throat. He grabs a-hold of her hair, simple
technique, and hits a head-butt. She falls on her ass.

James: Del brings Dark back to her feet and rolls her inside the ring. He
stands outside though  what is he, doing?

John: He is standing there. No, wait a second, he lifts up the ring apron
and pulls out a steel chair!

James: Ah, he had to think about it for a second. WAIT A SECOND; HE PULLS
OUT A STEEL CHAIR?

John: Yeah, this is so cool.

James: This is not cool! He cannot do this to a female! Allowing her to
wrestle her way through the match is okay but this  no, this is bad!

John: Now who is the prejudice one?

James: I am not prejudice! I am just afraid she will get hurt!

John: Oh well, she should not have signed a contract with SHOOT if she was
not expecting pain.

James: Del Carver slides in the ring with the steel chair. Dark is back to
her feet  Del Carver swings, WAIT A SECOND  DARK SLIDES TO HER KNEE AND
STRIKES A LOW BLOW ON DEL!

John:  oh no, this is not good!

James: Dark is back on her feet, she drops the steel chair from Del(s)
hands, and hits DDT! Dark goes for a cover

One
Two
The-

Kick out

James:  OH MAN, THAT WAS CLOSE! Dark is back on her feet. She climbs the
turnbuckle. She goes for a high-risk move, A FROGSPLASH COMING UP! AH, DEL
CARVER ROLLED OUT THE WAY!

John:  YES!

James: Del Carver swiftly brings Dark back to her feet, he sets her up
between his legs, and he hits a HELLACIOUS PILEDRIVER!

John:  now, THAT was a good move!

James: Del Carver goes for the cover  this could be over

One
Two
The-

Kick out

John: NO, IT IS NOT, SUPPOSED BE LIKE THAT!

James: Yes it is! Both contenders are hanging in there! These are the last
two left!

John: Del grabs a-hold of Dark s hair and brings her to her feet. He backs
her up into a turnbuckle  wait, NO!

James: Dark kicks Del in the gut, thus releasing his hand from her hair. She
spins him around and climbs up the turnbuckle, she flips over him, and there
is an INSIDE CRADLE!

One
Two
The-

Kick out

James:  SO CLOSE!

John: Close nothing, Dark never had it coming. Del Carver and Dark are back
to their feet now. Del goes for a clothesline, Dark ducks, and Del bounces
off the ropes  and, WHAT THE!

James:  DARK JUST HIT THE KRYSTAL CUTTER! Dark goes for the cover!

One
Two
Three

**Ding, Ding, Ding**

{ Living Dead Girl  by Rob Zombie blares over the pa speakers as Dark
attempts to gain back her breath, she stands up and is, declared the
winner.}

James: An excellent show by these two, Dark Krystal comes out the winner.
Congratulations dear girl, I knew you had it in you!
John: *Banging his head on the desk*  DAMN IT, DAMN IT, DAMN IT!

{Dark Krystal climbs through the ropes and jumps from the apron. Her feet
hit the ground, almost ready to walk up the ramp-way until Markus Anderson,
a SHOOT interviewer, approaches her with a microphone.}

Markus Anderson: Dark, I congratulate you on your win tonight. You and three
other rookies went through one hell of an interesting match to complete this
thing. But I have to ask you; in the main-event tonight, how partial of a
referee will you be tonight?

Dark Krystal: As everyone should know, I want revenge on Skull. I am going
to look for any possible way to keep him away from the title.

{Dark smiles, tosses back her hair, and continue walking up the ramp-way.}

Markus Anderson: Well there we have it! James, John, it is back to you two!

Casket of Fire Match
Roland the Dark v. Cronos Diamante

James: Okay, the bell rings. Both men get to the center of the ring rather
intently and Roland starts out with a few punches in on Cronos. From there
Roland grabs Cronos, knees him in the midsection, and then knocks Diamante
out of the ring.

John: As Cronos gets to his feet on the outside, Roland mocks Cronos, but
Cronos slides back into the ring, showing it did not take as much out of him
as Roland had thought.
James: Cronos right back up onto his feet and back in the ring.
John: It looks like Roland did not expect Cronos back in so quickly.
James: As Cronos a stand up to meet Roland yet again he is, hit with a few
punches to the face, then Diamante is, taken down by a chop to the neck.
Roland gets Cronos to his feet and then as he, goes for a vertical suplex
Cronos flips over at the height of the suplex and ends up standing behind
Roland.
John: Cronos spins Roland around and then kicks him, following it up with a
well-placed head butt. Cronos picks up Roland to his feet and goes to send
him into the ropes with an Irish whip but Roland reverses it, but as Cronos
comes, back he takes advantage of the fact that Roland is telegraphing a
back body drop and Cronos takes Roland down with a swinging neck breaker.
Roland telegraphing that back body drop and Cronos takes advantage of the
situation.
James: Make the most of it Cronos!
John: What is with this biased commentating here by James? I do not think he
should be, allowed here while Roland is wrestling anymore.
James: Cronos starts in on Roland, who is still trying to get up, pounding
on him for all he is worth. Roland shoves Cronos back a bit, getting himself
enough time to get to his feet. Cronos goes to send Roland into the ropes
but yet again... the Irish-whip is, reversed and on the return, Roland nails
Cronos with a knee to the midsection, doubling Cronos over. From there
Roland takes Cronos down to the mat with a double ax handle.
John: There ya go, get him Roland! Roland seems like maybe he is a bit too
strong for Cronos.
James: I am not so sure about that but it seems like Roland is getting good
at reversing Irish whips here tonight.
John: Roland starts to taunt the crowd a little bit and he does not realize
that Cronos gets up. Cronos grabs Roland from behind and takes him down with
a belly to back suplex, which gets a huge pop from the fans as Roland face
is one of complete surprise as he realizes that Cronos had grabbed him to
set up the move as he thought Diamante was still down on the mat.
James: Roland wasting a bit too much time there and he paid the price for
it.
John: You just cannot turn your back on Cronos or he will make you pay for
it.
James: Cronos goes to pick up Roland but Roland hits him with a low blow,
buying enough time to get to his feet. Roland gets up and proceeds to hit
Diamante in the face, then follows that up with a nice slam down to the mat.
John: Cronos rolls backwards, jumps up, runs over, and starts punching away
on Roland and then he picks him up and takes him down with a front slam. As
Roland lies on the mat, Cronos leaps up and lands down hard with a
well-placed elbow drop.
James: Nice execution on that elbow drop on Roland, He caught him right in
the chest!
John: Roland will be back in this match in no time, just you watch.
James: Cronos starts playing up to the fans and Roland is able slowly to get
to his feet. Cronos then grabs Roland by the hand and goes to whip him into
the ropes but yet again, the Irish-whip is, reversed, and on the return
Diamante is hit by Roland with an inverted atomic drop. Roland grabs Cronos
by the neck as he stands there stunned and hits a falling reverse neck
breaker. Roland then signals for his finisher and picks up Cronos. As he
goes for the Pillar of Darkness, Cronos reverses it and he starts hitting
Roland.
John: Diamante's punches send Roland reeling, and then as Roland runs back
over towards Cronos he is, taken down with a hip toss. Diamante sends Roland
into the ropes yet again and then takes Roland down with another hip toss.
James: Cronos is doing well, taking down Roland left and right!
John:  WAIT A SECOND, SEBASTIAN CROW FROM THE APRON! HE WRAPS BARBWIRE
AROUND CRONOS S THROAT, DRAGGING HIM OVER THE TOP ROPE!
James:  SEBASTIAN HAS HIM IN THE CASKET! SEBASTIAN HAS CRONOS DIAMANTE IN
THE CASKET; HE SHUTS THE LID
{Sebastian Crow glares up at Roland the Dark and nods his head.}
Beep. Beep. Beep.
James: Wait a second, a truck starts backing up inside the building  it is
Rancid, Randy  they grab a-hold of the casket, and they load it on the back
Randy and Rancid get back in the drivers seat and they drive off!
John: Where are they going? Where are they going with Diamante?
James: I do not know. Roland the Dark, he has won this match and  well, it
appears Roland is going with Sebastian! Has Roland joined the Conspirators?
Oh well, we will keep you informed of this  let us go to Arkansas!
Barnyard Brawl
Joking John Jinx v. Ben  The Blackout  Jackman

James:  Well here we go!  The moment we have all been waiting for

John: THE BARNYARD BRAWL, I smell Flair-Steamboat, Hart-Michaels. Thesz

James: Just stop.  Okay, let us go to Arkansas.

John: Wait.

James: Hold on folks, Daniel Jones has just added a stipulation.  To begin
the match Jinx and Jackman will be, locked in a barn.

John: But falls count anywhere, so if they break out of the barn, anything
goes.

James: Okay, now let us head to Arkansas.

{The barn is fairly, well lit.  It has a hayloft, which looks over the first
floor, with a ladder leading up to it.  One side of the barn is, lined with
stalls, which are, filled with cows.  On the other side is a huge pile of
hay, which is beneath the hayloft.  The two combatants walk into the barn,
along with a referee.  Another referee closes the door.}

John: The door is getting padlocked shut.  I doubt if they will be able to
get out of this barn.

James: But you never know.  Jinx is laughing and he walks over to a cow.

John: Why is he taunting the cow?

James: Oh, Jackman charges over and hits him with a forearm to the back.  He
starts laying kicks down.

John: He is taking his anger out on poor Joking John!

James: Jackman picks Jinx up and goes for DDT, but Jinx punches out of it
and, OW!

John: *laughing* He just bitch-slapped him!

James: Jackman blocks a punch and nails Jinx with one of his own.  Another
punch to the face, Jinx is propped up against the door to the cow s stall.
Jackman takes a step back.  Running elbow, Jinx bends over and flips Jackman
into the cow s stall  good Lord!

John:  Jackman is furious, as is the cow.  The cow is mooing loudly.

James:  Jackman just punched the cow in the snout.

John:  The cow is out for the count!  Jackman win
James: He is not fighting the cow.  Jinx is looking around for something.
He finds a cattle prod.  This could get ugly.  Jackman climbs out of the cow
stall.  Jinx advances on him and tries to shock him but Jackman grabs the
prod and nails Jinx over the head with it.

John: This is just like Flair-Steamboat!

{Jackman picks up the prod.}

James:  He just shocked Jinx.  Jinx is twitching on the ground.  This should
be it!  He goes for the cover.

One
Two

James: Good God, that stuttering hick just came out of nowhere', he nailed
Jackman in the back of the head with a shovel.  Jackman is down!

John:  He was in the hay pile; I can see the hay all over him.  The referee
has no idea what to do, and he yells at the hick.

James:  Jinx is getting to his feet, and he smiles at the hick.

Joking John Jinx: Welcome my friend GRENDEL the GEEK!  Show me your work.

John: A geek,

James:  This GRENDEL character is pulling something out of a satchel that he
has.  A chicken, what does him ?

John: Oh god, this is going to get disgusting.

James:  What do you oh sweet Jesus, GRENDEL just bit the head off the
chicken.  Oh

John:  Folks, James just ran off, I think he is getting sick.  GRENDEL(s)
grinning with blood coming out of his mouth, and he sits down cross-legged.
Jinx thinks this is just the funniest thing ever.  Jinx is pulling something
out of his tights.  It s some sort of tube it is a sawed of green garden
hose.  This person is insane; he has been calling that the  Irish Whip
around the locker-room.

{Jinx starts whipping Jackman.}

John:  James should be back in a couple minutes  folks, but right now Jinx
is getting ruthless with the Irish Whip.  He stops to do a cartwheel.
Jackman gets up.  Jinx turns to him and his smile fades.  Jackman kicks him
in the gut and DDT(s) him into the floor.  GRENDEL jumps up but he is, met
with a standing sidekick to the face.

James: I think GRENDEL(s) done.  Jackman turns his attention back to Jinx.
He picks the fallen body up and suplexes him.  He picks up the Irish Whip
and starts choking Jinx with it.  He lets go and spits on Jinx.  This has
turned into a very one-sided affair here.

John: Jackman looks around and sees the hayloft.  He starts climbing the
ladder.  He gets halfway up, and Jinx is getting up now.  How can he still
function?  Oh yes, he is a psychopath.  Jinx runs over and climbs up the
ladder.  Jackman sees him and kicks him in the face.  Jinx collapses to the
floor.

James: Jackman turns around on the ladder, and jumps off.  He hits a leg
drop.  Jinx is done!  But wait, Jackman seems to have hurt himself, in the
process. The floor is hard there.  They are both down.  And look who it is.

John:  Sorry about that folks, I ate burritos this evening.  Okay, well both
men are down!  Why, I do not know, but both men are down.

James: Jackman gets up and he motions for the Blackout Bomb, but I do not
know how he will do it, there are no ropes here.

John: Jackman is wondering that very same thing.

James: He picks up Jinx, and he is throwing him into the wall.

John: He wants to bounce him off it.

James: But Jinx goes right through the wall!  He crashed through it.

John: And look at Jackman s reaction.

James:  I do not think I have ever seen him so mad.  He s just flipping out.
  He hates this match to no end.  He is walking out the hole now, and Jinx
just nailed him!  A kick to the mouth and Jackman is down.  There is a
baseball slide to the face.

John: That looked viscous.

James: Jinx is up and walking around like a chicken some reason.

John: *laughing*  maybe he is summoning GRENDEL.

James: God help us, if he is.  Jackman is slowly getting to his feet,
dropkick from Jinx, he follows that with a headlock, then a bulldog, and oh
my god, is that

John: He just bulldogged him into a small pile of manure!

James: Jackman is up and running around, he is clawing at his face.  He
finds a water trough in a pigpen climbs in and douses his head with the
water.

John: What a shit head,

James: Jinx loves every second of this.  Jackman is still spitting and
trying to get the manure out.  Jinx runs, jumps on the fence, and hits a
hurricarana!  Beautiful offensive maneuver there, Jinx stands up in the
pigpen and stretches his arms out.

Jinx:  Pigs, I command thee.  Devour this lowly swine!

John:  For Christ s sake,

James:  Needless to say, the pigs are just lying there, ignoring Joking John
Jinx.  Jinx, disappointed, walks over to Jackman.  Jackman grabs his tights
and throws him over the fence.  Jackman jumps on the fence, and then goes
for a leg drop, but Jinx moves out of the way.  They both get back up.  A
punch back and forth, Jackman is on the offensive. He is forcing Jinx
towards a small shed-like building.

John: I think it is a chicken house.

James: Three straight punches from Jackman, and he loads up for a big
roundhouse, put Jinx ducks.  The momentum carries him against the chicken
house.  Jinx dropkicks him in the back, and Jackman goes headfirst through
the wall.

John:  And the chickens are going batty in there.  Listen to that clucking!

James: Jinx pulls Jackman out and goes for the pin.

One

Voice of camera: What, the hell are you doing to my farm?

Two

John:  Jinx is getting off.  He had the match won!

James: I think the owner of the farm is here.  Yes, look at him he is none
too happy.

John: None too young either, he look likes he s a hundred and six.

James:  The farmer has a pitchfork, and the referee goes over to talk to the
farmer.  What is Jinx doing?

John: It looks like he s chasing the goats around.  He should be working
Jackman over, waiting for the ref to be, done with the farmer.

James: Which seems to be now, the farmer is stalking away, but the referee
has a very concerned look on his face.  Jackman is slowly getting to his
feet.  His face is bleeding profusely.  Jinx sees him getting up and
regrettably leaves the goats.  Jackman tries to kick him in the stomach, but
Jinx catches it ENZIGURI!

John:  What impact!  Owen Hart would be proud.

James: Jinx went down hard after that. Wait a second, what is Blackman
doing? He is walking away!  It seems like he wants to go back to the barn.

John: The match was well in hand for him while they were still in there.  It
might be a good move.

James:  Jinx is getting up, and begins following Jackman.  Jackman goes
through the hole in the wall and back into the barn.  Jinx grabs a shovel,
and walks through the hole, but Jackman hits a drop toehold just as he gets
back into the barn and Jinx s head slams against the shovel.  Jackman roars
with fury, and kicks Jinx hard in the stomach.

John: GRENDEL(s) back up!

James: GRENDEL charges over, but Jackman steps out of the way and grabs him.
  He hits a running power bomb!  That MUST have killed him.

John: Wow, It looks almost like GRENDEL is, snapped in half.

James:  Wait, Jinx is back up.  Blood is streaming down his face and he is
climbing up the ladder, to the hayloft.  Jackman taunts the fallen GRENDEL
and sees Jinx.  He smiles and walks over to the ladder.  He begins climbing
it.  Jinx is in the hayloft.  He does a cartwheel.  Jackman gets up, and
immediately Jinx charges, Jackman avoids it.  He punches Jinx, and then hits
a belly-to-belly suplex.  Jinx is done.  Jackman stands over him.  A dark
smile crosses his face.  He picks Jinx up and puts him in power bomb
position. But Jinx flips him over!  Jackman just went over the edge to the
floor below!

John: He landed on the hay pile though.  That cushioned his blow.

James: Jinx, looks down on Jackman and smiles, He takes a couple steps back
and runs, does a cartwheel, and goes for a moon Sault!

John: Jackman moved!  Jinx goes face first into the hay!  Ouch.

James: Jackman stands up, he throws Jinx off the hay pile, and he rolls to
the floor.  Jackman walks down and stands over the fallen Joking John Jinx.
He motions for the Blackout Bomb.

John: Is this Dj vu?

James: Jackman decides not to do the full Blackout Bomb; instead, he hits a
variation, a sit-down Orange Crush.  This must be it.

One
Two
Three

John:  Quite the match,

James: The referee lifts Jackman s arms and-- what the hell.

John: Someone is trying to burst the barn door down!

James: The referee is running out the hole in the wall, and Jackman is just
staring at the door.  It bursts open!

John: It is a mob!

James: It is like Frankenstein here!  Farmers with torches and pitchforks
are angrily yelling at Jackman.  That old farmer leads the mob from earlier,
and they are charging into the barn.  Jackman books it out of there, running
through the hole in the wall.

{The picture turns into static, and the shot cuts to the announcers.  The
crowd is buzzing.  John and James each exhale and look into the camera.}

John: I guess Daniel Jones never got permission to use the farm.

:-Backstage Footage-:

{Daniel Jones watches the television monitor as the match happens.}

Daniel Jones:  uh, oops,

:-Exit Backstage Footage-:

{We fade back to Arkansas.}

James: Well folks, we will try to give you updates on Joking John Jinx, Ben
 The Blackout  Jackman, and the referees involved in Arkansas.  If we cannot
get any information during the show, we will be sure to update you on
Oblivion next week.

John: I think I speak for all of us, when I say Godspeed.  Mob justice is a
violent, yet beautiful thing in its own way.

Extreme Limits Match for the Tag Team Championship
The Flying Dutchman/the Fist v.  The Prodigy Son  Jeff Cross/Skull

James: Fans , how extreme can we get?

John:  limit wise, you mean.

James: Up next is our Extreme Limits Match for the Tag Team Championship
thus pitting  The Prodigy Son  Jeff Cross, Skull, against the two debut
rookies  the Flying Dutchman and the Fist.

{ Too Cool for School!  by the SHOOT Project blares over the pa speakers as
The Dutchman has a microphone in his hand; Dutch spins on one foot in a
quick circle as The Fist lifts a sledgehammer in the air and swings it over
his head.  The two pause and give each other a quick look that says, "We're
ready for this."  They nod at each other and walk down the ramp as the crowd
cheers for the new comers to The Shoot Project.}

{Dutch slides into the ring as The Fist places the sledgehammer underneath
it as though it belonged there all along.  Fist climbs up into the ring and
raises his fists into the air as The Dutchman flexes on the turnbuckle. Once
the Dutch is, done fooling around, he raises his hand to silence the crowd.
As he addresses the champions, The Fist slowly paces in circles around them
like a caged tiger.}

Dutch: Cut our music  I am sure you all are wondering just who the, hell we
are, why the two of us are standing here in the middle of this ring to
challenge a couple fucks for those Tag Team titles.  Well, let me tell you
something. We are here to make a name for ourselves.  We are here to make an
impact

{The Fist slams his fist into his palm.}

Dutch (CONT D):  we are here to leave as champions  now; we intend to take
those belts from them tonight.  They do not have a choice in the matter
either, because we are going to win  anyway we can.  We will be the Tag Team
champions.  Why, simply because we are better than they are.  AND because we
are, better than this piss hole of a federation. Once we win that gold  at
least, I *think* that is gold  it could be brass for all I know. Especially
considering how this place is.  Once we win those titles, we will be well on
our way to being, noticed by those more prestigious federations.  So,
frankly, do not worry.  We will not be a thorn in their side for long.  We
will win those belts  are noticed  and move along to better things.  Then,
they can have their little titles back and continue their competition with
the rest of these no talent hacks.

{Dutch pauses to glance at the booing crowd as the Fist stops pacing and
stands next to him.}

Dutch: As far as introductions go  you can call me "The Flying Dutchman.

{Dutch gestures towards The Fist }

Dutch:  This is my partner and bodyguard, The Fist.  *Your* names do not
matter to us, seeing as we are only going to be a here a short while.  We
are The Madmen  and we are better than this place.

Dutch hands the microphone over to "The Fist".

Fist:  I hope you liked those belts

Ring Announcer, Samantha Coil: Introducing first in our tag team
championship war, introducing a couple rookies to the SHOOT Project and
because I do not know their stat information, I will make this quick  they
are the challengers for the tag team titles  the FLYING DUTCHMAN AND THE
FIST!

{ Break Yaw Neck  by BUSTA RHYMES blares over the pa speakers as  The
Prodigy Son  Jeff Cross walks out on-stage }

John: Hey, he looks familiar.

James: Of course, he was, once known as Mister Crowe.

{The song swiftly changes into  Mastermind  by MEGADETH as Skull walks out
on-stage, they side-by-side with the Tag Team Titles draped over their
shoulders, smile, and run to the ring  thanks to their hurries, Samantha
cannot announce their introductions.}

**Ding, Ding, Ding**

John: Shit, these men are not wasting any time! The Flying Dutchman and the
Fist slide out of the ring and they collide with Skull and Jeff Cross,
throwing lefts and rights toward one another

James:  I keep wanting to say Crowe when I think of Cross.

John: I know what you mean. Cross and Dutchman going at it, Cross walks
Dutchman to the steel guardrail and lets him have it! He follows it up with
an uppercut to the jaw, an elbow to the gut, and a back fist to the face.

James:  Everybody was kung-fu fighting.

John:  Damn Jackie Chan movies, Cross-and Skull are two movie buffs.

James:  no, Skull is the movie buff  Cross is the baseball/Internet monkey.

John: Oh, okay.

James: Yeah, I know my facts. Skull walks Fist around the ladder and rams
his face into the ring! He follows it by putting Fist s head under his arm
and running him across the ring apron, straight into the ring-post! Ouch,
that smarts!

John: Now Cross-rolls the Flying Dutchman in the ring, he lifts up the ring
apron and pulls out a steel chair, our FIRST steel chair in the contest

James: He slides in the ring too. He goes for a chair shot but wait, the
Flying Dutchman leaps to his feet and takes care of Cross with an awesome
drop-kick! It cracked the chair across Cross s face.

John: The Flying Dutchman runs, bounces off the ropes  Cross-catches him
before anything happens

James: It looked as if the Flying Dutchman was going for a leap over the
ropes onto Skull. That plan backfired. Jeff Cross brings Dutchman back to
his feet. He has a-hold of his hair but wait, the Dutchman just nailed Jeff
Cross with a HUGE low blow from the back leg!

John:  ouch,

James: Yeah, ouch,

John: The Flying Dutchman grabs a-hold of Jeff Cross and runs him across the
ring, jumps on the top-rope, and flips over Jeff. Wow, that is great speed!
Jeff Cross charges for the Flying Dutchman with a clothesline but the Flying
Dutchman catches Jeff Cross and scores with a power slam.

James:  nice, that is very nice. The Flying Dutchman scores with a leg-drop
to the throat! In comes Skull

**CRACK**

John: Ha, yes, Skull cracks a steel chair over the Flying Dutchman s head. I
love it.

James: Skull helps Jeff Cross back to his feet. They double-team the Flying
Dutchman. They whip him to the ropes and hit a double clothesline, followed
by double elbows to the chest.

John: This is great! Skull and Jeff Cross grab a-hold of the Flying Dutchman
and tie him up in the ropes! Now Jeff Cross is sending continuous kicks to
the gut but here comes the Fist, and he knocks Skull down WITH a huge fist!

James: Jeff Cross notices and goes forward to the Fist. The Fist starts
throwing shots to Jeff Crosses face, backing him in the corner. The Fist
climbs the turnbuckle now

One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten

James:  The Fist turns around and

John: YES, Skull is back in the ring with the ladder! He sends the ladder
into the gut of the Fist. Now he rams it into the Fist, forcing him into the
corner Jeff Cross is in!

James: What, the hell,

John: Jeff Cross tries to catch breath from the impact. Skull grabs a-hold
of the Fist now and  he delivers a Skull Bomb! How, the hell did he do that?

James: Damn, wrestling is, fucked up.

John: He delivered a Skull Bomb to the Fist on the ladder. Jeff Cross, he
flies off the turnbuckle now and lands on the Fist with a frog splash.

James: Jesus, these men will do anything!

John: Do you think they will whack off?

James: WHAT,

John:  nothing, *Embarrassed*

James: I am still wondering how this 7-footer Skull bombed another 7-footer

John: Does it matter?

James:  no,

John: Then shut up and watch the damn match.

James: Eh, yeah, that sounds like a plan. Okay, the Dutchman has another
steel chair and he slides in the ring. All four men are in the ring and what
is this  referees are wrapping barbwire around the ropes!

John: I guess they forgot to do that earlier!

James: Skull brings the Fist back to his feet and Irish whips him to the
turnbuckle, followed by a clothesline. Skull sends a hard chop to the Fist s
chest. In the meantime, the Flying Dutchman hits a steel chair over Jeff s
back, and sets him up. The Flying Dutchman looks to be going for a pile
driver, no, Jeff Cross hits a back body drop! Jeff Cross bounces off the
ropes and hits a hard, hitting sphere, knocking the Dutchman off his feet!
Now Jeff Cross is slamming rights and lefts to the face of Dutchman. There
is a reversal though! The Dutchman is hammering at Jeff Crosses face.

John: Skull sets the Fist up for an Irish whip; the Fist reverses, and sends
Skull crashing in the turnbuckle! Skull walks out; the Fist lifts Skull
above his head  GORILLA PRESS SLAM, he tosses him onto the ladder!

James:  oh my,

John: James, you are such a gay homophobe.
James: What,

John: I know you are gay man

James: Excuse me!

John:  you are just too afraid to admit it

James: Can we concentrate on the match please?

John: What is the matter  you are dying for the cock, are you not!

James: You are an annoying little queer , do you know that?

John: Ha-ha.

James: Let us concentrate back on the match! The Fist is setting up the
ladder now. The champions are down and the Dutchman starts to climb

John: How embarrassing it would be if Jeff and Skull lost to a couple of
rookie losers!

James: The Fist is paying attention to his partner  he does not see Jeff
Cross, Jeff reaches up, he folds up the ladder  THE FIST AND FLYING DUTCHMAN
REALIZE THIS AND

John: HOLY SHIT, THE DUTCH HAD BETTER HANG ON! Skull has control of the
ladder now. Skull holds it above his head  the Flying Dutchman is, still
attached and Skull, Skull tosses the ladder to the outside!

James: The ladder tips over and the Flying Dutchman goes through the steel
guardrail, the ladder landing on top!

John: Ha, that was powerful! Skull and the Fist go at it now. Jeff Cross
exits the ring and pulls up the apron. He pulls out a TABLE! IT IS ABOUT
TIME!

James: Jeff pushes in a table  the Flying Dutchman is still down and out of
it! Skull and the Fist are fighting it out! Jeff Cross sets up the table,
now he joins in on the fight with Skull. They bounce the Fist off the ropes
the Fist charges for the table, he stops himself, and I do have no clue that
their motive was but

John: YIKES, JEFF CROSS JUST BACKFLIPPED HIMSELF OFF THE ROPES ONTO THE
FIST! THE FIST GOES THROUGH THE TABLE!

James: That was a sweet set-up!

John: Now Skull has the ladder set-up and Jeff Cross goes for the titles
AH, WAIT A SECOND, THE DUTCHMAN JUST SENT A DROP KICK TO THE LADDER! IT
FALLS OVER AND, JEFF CROSS, JEFF CROSS LANDS TO THE OUTSIDE!

James: Where did the Dutchman come from?

John: I do not know. It must have been a quick recovery. Now it is down to
the Dutchman and Skull. Skull sets up the ladder again  he starts climbing
the Dutchman starts to climb on the other end!
James: One of these two men will gain control of the SHOOT Project Tag Team
Titles! They at the top now  they are exchanging lefts and rights  both men
trying to balance themselves on the ladder, who will it, are. Who will be
the SHOOT Tag Team Champions?

John:  WHOA, SKULL, SKULL LIFTS THE DUTCHMAN UP WITH A VERTCIAL SUPLEX AND
TOSSES HIM BACK TO THE MAT!

James:  Jesus Christ, Skull has a shot now  the ladder is tilting back and
fourth

John:  he reaches for the gold  HE HAS IT!

**Ding, Ding, Ding**

James:  SHIT, THE LADDER FALLS, AND SKULL FALLS THE OTHER WAY

**CRACK**

James: SKULL IS HOLLERING IN PAIN!

John: Shit James, did you hear that?

James: This is not good. Something happened, somewhere in Skull s body, a
bone cracked. It echoed through the entire audience!

John:  my God, we need paramedics  and a janitor.

James: Skull and Jeff Cross are still the SHOOT Project Tag Team Champions.
As we get this mess cleaned up, we will move onto our next match  the
Birdcage Match.

John:  oh, that match is going to be tight!

**ADVERTISEMENT FOR SPIDER-MAN   MAY 3RD**

Birdcage Match to the #1 Contender ship to the SHOOT Title
Chris Lee v. Sebastian Crow

{A gigantic oval-shaped birdcage surrounds the ring. The top is, closed off
by a door, likely holding the birds for the ending , the lights are
flickering on and off throughout the arena as  The Strong  by FLAW blare
over the pa speakers.}

John: This match is going to be tight! Never in the history of wrestling
have I seen something like this, James!

James: Who would of funk it! Go over the rules again John, they are funny.

John: Ha, okay, here are the rules: Sebastian Crow and Chris Lee will battle
in the Birdcage, right. They will be fighting for a shot at the SHOOT Title.
Cool, yes, but here is the funny thing. It appears scientists have
discovered a new breed of the  new  York pigeons mutated several years into
the future called, Rabid Shit Pigeons. This breed of bird is rabid in many
ways and attack to kill. On a second note, they have an exceeding
shit-problem that once only occurred if they got scared

James:  So what happened?

John: In the day, this new breed of bird was, considered Adam and Eve but
called Pecker and Breed. Well, one of the birds shit him-self so much during
sex; it was his first time that he could not quit. Pecker impregnated Breed
and they were then, called  Rabid Shit Pigeons . They are excessively angry.
This explains the pecker.

James: Jesus, okay, let us get this match over with! Once Sebastian or Chris
climbs the ladder to success, the birds will be, released. I hope they can
get out ALIVE!

John: Yeah, even on Sebastian Crow s behalf. I know how much you dislike
him.

James:  oh God, do not remind me!

{ Fuel my Fire  by Prodigy blares over the pa speakers as Chris Lee walks to
the ring, trying to keep focus on his match tonight, staring at the gigantic
birdcage that rests over the ring.}

Ring Announcer, Samantha Coil: Introducing first, he is a FORMER Rising Star
and Rule of Surrender Champion, self-proclaimed the legend of the Triad  he
weighs in at 251 pounds, at a height of 6 4  CHRIS LEE!

{The fans literally go nuts at the sound of Chris Lee s name being, called.
They give him the respect he deserves.}

James: Chris Lee, fans, will be competing against Sebastian Crow tonight!
This match could get interesting

John:  especially the rabid shit birds, that is tight! One question, how did
Daniel Jones get hold of a new breed of birds before they were, discovered?
James: Who knows, this is wrestling. People are not supposed to figure out
that stuff. They just sit back and say,  OOH  and  AHH!

John: Oh, that explains Jason s comeback  JASON X, IN THEATERS NOW PEOPLE!
 Evil NEEDS an upgrade!

James: Ha, that is terrible.  So where the fuck is Sebastian Crow?

John: I do not know. It looks as if Chris Lee is getting tired of waiting
too. If he paces the ring long enough, he could invent a wrestling orgasm.

James: Ha, I think that has all ready been, done before, John

John: Damn it, I was not involved!

James: I am afraid not

John:  well, suffering bird-shit James! This is terrible news! Wait a
second, uh; Chris Lee has the microphone!

Chris Lee: Sebastian, I cannot wait all night. Get your dick-pecking ass out
here right now and let us settle this!

{All the sudden, a round cloud of smoke appears behind Chris Lee.}

James: Wait a minute  what, the hell is that?

John: Chris Lee turns around and  IT IS A BLACK PANTHER, A BLACK PANTHER
JUST LEAPED OUT OF THE SMOKE AT LEE  holy shit!

James: That panther is gnawing at Chris Lee s body! He is trying to chew
right through him! He is clawing at his face, marks are being, left, and
this is horrible!

{A loud echoing laugh goes through the atmosphere.}

John: Wait a minute, what was that?

James: I do not know! Somebody was laughing through the arena. The smoke in
the ring is getting bigger! It is surrounding the ring like a huge festival
parade float!

John: In the meantime, we can still hear the growls from that panther James!
It must be tearing Lee to shreds!

James: Oh, let us hope not  the smoke clears from the ring and standing in
it, it is a figure  GOD, we could have imagined! It is Sebastian Crow, he is
standing there  look at that sadistic look on his face!

John:  he has lost it, James. This man has literally lost it!

James: The panther releases Chris Lee. Chris Lee sees Sebastian, he charges
for him, and Sebastian  he pulls out a rag and he holds it against Lee s
mouth! NO, GOD NO, THIS IS  THIS IS SICK!

John:  Sebastian and his panther are not only manhandling Chris Lee, but he
is also being embarrassed

Fans: LEE, LEE, LEE, LEE, LEE, LEE,

James:  the fans are literally behind Chris Lee! Come on Lee, you have to
fight through this!

John: WHAT, OKAY, I DID NOT EXPECT THIS TO HAPPEN  CHRIS LEE JUST SENT A
BACK ELBOW INTO THE GUT OF SEBASTIAN! Now Chris hits a snap-mare takedown.
He charges up and kicks the shit out of Sebastian s back! Now Chris has the
rag, he grabs a-hold of Sebastian in a sleeper hold and  now, the chain
reaction starts

**Ding, Ding, Ding**

James: Oh, now the bell sounds!

John: Sebastian fights his way up though! Chris Lee is hanging on, trying to
keep that rag on Sebastian Crow s mouth

James: No luck, Sebastian went flying back and Chris Lee landed on the
bottom! He had to release. Sebastian stands up, he brings Chris Lee to his
feet, and Irish whips him to the ropes. Sebastian goes for a clothesline,
Lee ducks, and Lee hits Sebastian with a spinning heel kick.

John: Chris Lee charges for Sebastian, Sebastian gets a boot up though and
kicks Lee back. Lee goes flying back against the ropes! Sebastian stands up
and grabs a-hold of Lee, sending shots to his back.

James: Sebastian Irish whips Chris from the ropes into the turnbuckle. Chris
walks out from the turnbuckle and Sebastian collides with a powerhouse
clothesline! Jesus, that nearly took Chris Lee s head, off!

John: Now, Sebastian is checking out the slip of paper hanging above. I
wonder if Sebastian knows about the Rabid Shit Pigeons

James: I do not know, John. Why, how about you go tell him?

John:  yeah, maybe I should go tell him  HEY! I AM NOT ANY FEATHER BRAIN S
SHIT-HOLE! DO YOU HAVE THAT?

James:  yeah, whatever John, it was a lousy attempt to get you away from me
a little early. Too bad it did not work.

John:  asshole; Sebastian Crow brings Chris Lee to his knees and Chris Lee
hits a low blow! Oh no, this is not good! Chris Lee tosses Sebastian into
the corner and starts pounding away  no, this is SERIOUSLY not good!

James: Now he climbs the turnbuckle. He is going for the ten-punch count!

One
Two
Three
James:  DAMN! He did not succeed. Sebastian just pushed Chris Lee to the
mat. Now Sebastian stands on the turnbuckle, Lee is up; Sebastian flies off,
and strikes Lee with a flying clothesline!

John: Now, Sebastian goes to the outside. He lifts up the ring apron and
pulls out a ladder. He pushes it in the ring, followed by a wrapping of
barbwire

{Sebastian Crow smiles at the barbwire.}

James:  weirdo,

John: Chris Lee is back on his feet  Sebastian wraps the barbwire around his
hand and there! Sebastian just knocked the SHIT out of Chris Lee! He lifts
up Chris s head and starts pounding the barbwire in.

James: Ouch, Jesus Christ, this man is insane.

John: Ha, girls like insane James

James: *Curious*  they do?

John:  yes *Strong Pause*  they do.

James: Oh, uh, wait, I am married right.

John: Yes you are.

James: Damn those scriptwriters,

John: Back to the match, as if we are paying attention, Sebastian runs Chris
across the ring and tosses his head into the turnbuckle! Wait, Chris
counters though and sends a head-butt to Sebastian! Sebastian steps back
from the impact and Chris charges, taking Sebastian off his feet with a
clothesline!

James: Chris brings Sebastian back to his feet. He sends a hard punch to his
face, followed by another, this backing Sebastian against the ropes.
Sebastian charges for Chris, fighting back, he goes for a shot, Chris
blocks, and hits Sebastian with a back-to-belly SUPLEX! Now Chris Lee goes
down for a sleeper hold, there is NO referee  Lee is just going to try to
kill Sebastian off here

John: Is that not the general idea?

James: It looks as if Lee is keeping it there this time! No, wait, Sebastian
is fighting his way back up again  he fights out, he grabs a-hold of Lee,
and levels him with a perfect bulldog!

John:  back to his feet, he slams down with an elbow to the chest.

James: Sebastian is back to his feet and he goes for the ladder. He stands
it up. No, wait a second, Lee is back to his feet, and he grabs a-hold of
Sebastian, and hits an outstanding belly-to-belly SUPLEX!

John: Now, Chris Lee is kicking the hell out of Sebastian! Sebastian catches
his foot and flips him over. Sebastian climbs over Lee and sends numerous
shots to the face. Wait a second, Chris Lee with a monkey flip! That is some
awesome potential! I do hand him that.

James: Lee and Sebastian are back up! Sebastian charges for Lee and Lee
sends Sebastian up and over the ropes! Sebastian lands on the concrete
floor  CHRIS LEE, CHRIS LEE FLIES OVER AND PUTS SEBASTIAN DOWN! Chris just
slammed Sebastian into that steel birdcage!

John: No, this is not good! Chris Lee has hold of Sebastian now and he slams
his face into the birdcage, pressing it in. Sebastian Crow is growling in
pain

James: Chris Lee Irish whips Sebastian and sends him into the steel steps!

John:  ouch,

James: Chris Lee charges for Sebastian, Sebastian moves out of the way, and
Chris hits his knee against the steel steps! Now, Sebastian is back up. He
hits an uppercut on Lee. It is not over though  Sebastian, with the steel
steps  DAMN, he just rammed those steel steps into Chris Lee s face!

John: Yes, now this is getting good! Lee stumbles back a bit from the
impact  Sebastian, OUCH, HE TOSSES THE STEEL STEPS INTO CHRIS LEE! Chris Lee
falls back! Now, Sebastian pulls up the apron. He goes searching for a  a  a
steel chair! He grabs the steel chair now  the steel steps are still lying
across Lee and

**CRACK**

James: Ouch, Sebastian just bashed the steel chair over the steel steps  Lee
feels the impact underneath

John: Sebastian tosses the steel chair into the ring  he flips the steps off
Lee and sets him up on the outside  what is it going to be  a PILE DRIVER!

James: That is it! Chris Lee has to be out of it!

John: I agree. I do not know how much longer Lee can last tonight. You do
not want to fight a nearly 7 2 machine. On second thought, you do not want
to fight a nearly 7 2 angry demonic machine!

James: I quite agree but tonight, Lee is taking that chance! He is taking
that risk! Chris Lee is moving on the outside now. As Chris starts to stand
up, Sebastian charges at Chris with a boot to the face, but Chris catches
the shot and trips Sebastian with a leg of his own!

John: Lee brings Sebastian back to his feet and locks his head; he starts
pounding Sebastian s head against the ring apron, what, the fuck

James: That is what I call wrestling!

John: I call that pig style wrestling  YEE HAW! That is slang for,  I smell
like shit.
James: Ha, a funny thing to say especially when we are in Atlanta  thank God
it is not Arkansas.

John:  oh God, do not remind me Arkansas! Enough is enough for one night!

James: Lee rolls Sebastian in the ring. He reaches under the ring and grabs
a  a trash can. He slides in the ring. Sebastian is back to his feet and Lee
goes for a trash can shot, Sebastian blocks it, and now, they are fighting
over the trashcan! That trashcan is, held in the air by both competitors;
they are fighting over it!

John: Sebastian shoves it in Lee s face  Lee shoves it in Sebastian s face
Sebastian shoves it back  Lee shoves it back  FINALLY, SEBASTIAN JUST TAKES
A STEEL CHAIR AND SHOVES IT IN!

James: Sebastian kicks the trashcan aside and turns the steel chair
sideways. He rams it into Lee s mouth  again  again  Jesus Christ, he takes
it and

**CRACK**

James:  he smashes it over Chris Lee s face.

John: Chris Lee must be out of it by now! Sebastian grabs the ladder again
and stands it up. Sebastian starts climbing

James:  Chris Lee is almost back to his feet!

John: Sebastian Crow is climbing the ladder! And Chris Lee, he climbs up
after him and, A REVERSE SUPLEX FROM THE LADDER!

James: Ouch, I think that took out both men! Do you realize how high that
slip of paper is?

John:  pretty, damn far.

James:  exactly, both men are down. They are not moving!

John: Chris Lee is crawling his way across the ring though. He rolls out of
the ring and falls to the ground. Meanwhile, Sebastian is still out of it!

James: At least one of our competitors is slightly up and running

John:  why does it HAVE to be Chris Lee?

James: If it makes you feel any better  Sebastian Crow is starting to stand
up; he is on knees right now.

John: Where is Chris Lee?

James: Chris Lee is still on the outside somewhere

John: Sebastian Crow slowly starts pacing himself to the ropes and  WHAT
THE, SEBASTIAN CROW HAS BEEN SPRAYED! CHRIS LEE WAS ON THE OUTSIDE WAITING
ON HIM WITH A FIRE EXTINGUISHER! HE IS STILL SPRAYING HIM! Now, he grabs
a-hold of Sebastian Crow s hair and sends a punch to the side of his face!

James: Sebastian steps through the ropes and Chris Lee takes control  did I
just say, Sebastian steps through the ropes?

John: Uh, yes you did.

James:  damn scripts.

John:  what scripts?

James: Good point, now, Chris Lee walks Sebastian to the other side of the
ring. He tosses his head into the birdcage  John, I am still wondering how
much longer these men can last out? They are all ready bleeding!

John: We will see  and Chris Lee goes for an Irish whip, Sebastian reverses,
and  SHIT, CHRIS LEE GOES THROUGH THE CELL WALL, CRASHING THROUGH THE
GUARDRAIL!

James: Was that supposed to happen?

John: Sebastian Crow follows  he brings Lee back to his feet and bends the
cell covering, wrapping it around Lee!

James: What, the hell,

John: I am serious! No, wait, I am not  yes I am! Sebastian now brings Lee
from out of it and drills the side end into Lee s forehead!

James:  ouch, that has to hurt! Watch as the blood pours out onto the floor!
Chris Lee is growling at the pain

John: Sebastian tosses Lee back into the cage. Lee is crawling away, trying
to break free for a second rest  Sebastian keeps following, as he sends a
boot into Lee s ass, followed by an elbow to the heart. He stands Chris Lee
up and rolls him back in the ring.

James: Sebastian Crow gets on the apron and starts climbing the turnbuckle
he is going for a high-risk move, Lee is almost up, and he grabs something
Sebastian Crow goes for it and Chris Lee strikes Sebastian in the stomach
with a fist full of barbwire!

John: Ouch, THAT HAS TO HURT!

James:  followed by DDT on a steel chair! Sebastian is holding onto his
guts, in pain here!

John: Chris Le has the chance! He stands up the ladder and starts climbing
it. Sebastian cannot stand up

James: I do not imagine! That shot to the guts, especially from barbwire,
will injure anybody for a long time! Chris Lee continues climbing  he must
be going nearly 30+ feet above ring-level to reach the slip!

John: LOOK AT SEBASTIAN THOUGH; HE IS FIGHTING HIS WAY BACK UP! He is
toughing it out!

James: Sebastian Crow is still very injured, bleeding from his stomach. He
starts climbing the other side of the ladder  Chris Lee notices this  he
pauses, no, keep going Chris!

John: Chris Lee keeps going but Sebastian reaches through the steps, he
grabs a-hold of Lee s foot and brings him down the stairs! Chris Lee hangs
onto the ladder; the ladder is stumbling from that fall! Lee hit his jaw on
the way down; it looks like

James: Now Sebastian and Chris are at equal heights  they are climbing up;
this has to be it, let us see who the conclusion winner is! Who will go to
next month s pay per view to fight the SHOOT Champion, whoever that may be
after tonight!

John: JAMES, LOOK AT THEM! THEY ARE AT THE TOP STEP! Now, they are slugging
it out! They are reaching for the slip of paper! They are pushing each other
away! Who will it be? THEY HAVE THE SLIP OF PAPER  wait; they are fighting
over it

James:  uh-oh,

John: Come on men, you cannot do that!

James: Let us hope what I think happens does not happen

{Suddenly, the piece of paper rips in two.}

James:  oh shit.

John:  oh monkey shit.

:-STRONG SILENCE-:

James:  what, the hell just happened?

John: Okay James, Sebastian was tugging for it, Chris Lee was tugging for
it, uh, and they both got it!

{The entire sudden, there is a loud intercom voice echo over the pa
speakers   RELEASE THE BIRDS!  }

John:  oh SHIT! Sebastian and Chris agree to one thing, they are climbing
down the ladder as quickly as possible! The sounds of flocking birds, I can
hear them coming from inside that blackness  SHIT

James: Yeah, I know John; this is un-real!

John: No, I really mean it James  shit!

{Shit droppings fall to the mat and all around inside the cage.}

James: OH SHIT, THAT IS SHIT! Sebastian and Chris are dodging it as fast as
they can  at last, they made their way off the ladder and  THERE THEY ARE!
THERE ARE THE BIRDS! THEY CIRCLED SEBASTIAN CROW; THEY TOOK SEBASTIAN OFF
HIS FEET  CHRIS LEE TRIED TO EXIT THE RING  NO LUCK, THE BIRDS GOT HIM TOO!

John: This shit is crazy, James!

James: The birds are flocking and pecking the shit out of our two
competitors! Bird shit is falling everywhere inside that cage!

John: Call Aaron, he will know what to do!

James: Sebastian Crow has finally rolled out of the ring and is staying as
low as possible, hoping the birds will not see him  he exits the cage,
followed by Chris Lee and, OH MY GOD, THE BIRDS ARE LOOSE!

{The audience screams.}

John: *Stands up* FOLKS, JUST MOVE WHEN THEY ARE TO YOU!

James:  you idiot, the birds are loose in the audience!

John: Oh my God, this IS insane!

{A little kid cries, running through the audience.}

A little kid: WHA, MOMMY, DOODEE,

James: Shit, this is crazy  Sebastian and Chris have finally exited the
ringside area, they are both winners  do not know how but these birds
yikes, call the janitor department, we have an emergency!

**PROMO FOR OBLIVION**

Two out of Three falls for the SHOOT Title
 The Prodigy Son  Jeff Cross v.  The Real Deal  Josh Johnson

James: Well folks, here we go. We finally have the birds cleared from the
audience and Crowe finally gets a shot to compete for the SHOOT title
against none other than SHOOT Project Champion, Josh Johnson. Let us get
things rolling!

{ Break Yaw Neck  by BUSTA RHYMES blares over the pa speakers as  The
Prodigy Son  Jeff Cross walks to the ring, gaining a mixed reaction from the
fans.}

Ring Announcer, Samantha Coil: Introducing first in our main-event, the
challenger, he is one-half of the SHOOT Project Tag Team Champions,  THE
PRODIGY SON  JEFF CROSS!

James: Jeff Cross used to be part of Sebastian Crow s Conspirators

John: Yes, but earlier tonight, he and Skull made the mistake by leaving the
Conspirators.

{ I Stand Alone  by GODSMACK blares over the pa speakers as  The Real Deal
Josh Johnson walks to the ring, gaining a huge pop reaction from the fans.}

Ring Announcer, Samantha Coil: Introducing second in our main-event, he is
the SHOOT Project World Heavyweight Champion! He is as well a FORMER Iron
Fist and Triad Champion,  THE REAL DEAL  JOSH JOHNSON!

James: Looks like he is the fan favorite in this one.

John: When is he not fan favorite? I cannot people are buying into his lies
lately.

James: He is not lying, he has been telling the truth.

John: Now remember, Jeff Cross is taking Skull's place in this match. Since
he was hurt in the tag match earlier with Cross.

James: That is right. He teamed up with his new running friend Cross. Rancid
handed the title back to Jeff and he was stuck without a partner for the
night.

John: Running friend (he laughs a bit) that is a good one. Running from the
cops together and all,

James: When Skull fell from the ladder, the echo of a crack went through the
audience.

John: That was a sad sight indeed.

James: Speak for yourself. I enjoyed watching that evil bastard get what he
deserves.

{Jeff Cross gets in the ring as the bell rings.}

John: And we start our main event. This should be interesting.

James: Jeff Cross charges at Real Deal, who counters with a drop toe hold.
Real Deal picks Cross-up by the hair and whips him into the ropes. He come
running back and hits Real Deal with a lariat, knocking him down.

John: Jeff Cross gets on top of Johnson and begins pounding away with lefts
and rights. Johnson kicks Cross off and gets to his feet. He grabs Cross and
bulldogs him to the mat. Johnson goes to the top turnbuckle. That is not a
usual Real Deal move.

James: He is not, known for high flying really, but he can do it when he
wants to. Johnson leaps off. He is, met with a hard fist to the gut.

John: That was one hell of a punch! Jeff Cross stands to his feet as Josh
Johnson is rolling around on the mat holding his stomach.

James: That was no ordinary punch. Jeff Cross puts the pair of brass
knuckles back in his tights as Dark Krystal is checking on Johnson. Jeff
Cross pushes Dark Krystal aside, and she gets in his face. Jeff's about to
hit Dark Krystal

John: Do not hit the ref man. You will be, disqualified!

James: And he would not be champion.

John: Krystal takes her index finger and points at her referee shirt, which
causes Jeff to turn back to Real Deal. He slides out of the ring, and grabs
Johnson. He drags him to the ring post. He wants to slam his leg against it!

James: But Johnson kicks him away instead. Jeff Cross falls against the
guardrail. Johnson gets to his feet and slingshots over the top rope. He
comes flying down on Cross with a cross body block. Both men go down hard.
Dark Krystal begins her ten counts. I am not sure who got the worst of that
one.

John: Real Deal gets up and whips Cross into the steel ring steps, knocking
them over. Cross-hit the stairs with his elbow and his holding hit tight to
his side. Dark Krystal gets to the eight counts and says fuck it. She sits
down on the ring post and just watches. What is that bitch doing?

James: She is letting there be a winner. She is not going to let this match
go with a disqualification.

John: Jeff Cross is slowly getting to his feet. Josh backs up and charges
and, HOLY SHIT! Jeff Cross grabbed a running Johnson and lifts him into the
air. He slams him down onto the knocked over steel steps with a Samoan Slam.
His body bends over practically backwards on the steps.

James: Did you hear that impact? Jeff Cross rolls Johnson's body off the
stairs and rolls him into the ring. Cross-goes for a pin

John: This is it, the first fall!

James: Dark Krystal hops down off the turnbuckle and begins counting.

One
Two

John: What the fuck is she doing? Dark Krystal stops counting and begins
looking at her nails. Jeff Cross gets off Johnson and gets in Krystal's
face. She acts as if she did nothing wrong.

James: YES,

John: Johnson somehow musters up the strength to roll Crossover in an inside
cradle.

One
Two
Kick out

John: That was a fast count damn it!

James: Cross gets up and whips The Real Deal into the corner. He follows in
and climbs the second ropes. He begins punching away as the audience counts.

One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six

James: Man Jeff is not letting up.

John: He really wants this title.

Seven
Eight
Nine

John: OH MY GOD, Josh Johnson lifts Jeff up and over, sending him flying
through the outside.

James: FUCK, OUR TABLE, Jeff Cross comes crashing down onto our table,
collapsing it under his weight. Josh Johnson gets on the top turnbuckle and
leaps off

John:  a desperate move,

James: But effective if he lands it,

John: HOLY SHIT, just before landing, Cross-rolls over and Johnson hits the
pile that used to be the announcer s table. Johnson hit the side of his ribs
on one of the monitors, smashing it into pieces.

James: These people are giving it their all tonight.

John: It is a big match, neither one is going to give up.

James: Both men are, laid out flat outside the ring. Neither one moving,
Johnson is, cracked open from the monitor.

John: Dark Krystal starts counting for both of them.

One
Two

James: Come on, somebody move,

Three

James: Dark Krystal rings for the bell.

John: So who won that fall?

Ring Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen. Special referee Dark Krystal has
declared the first fall, a DRAW!

James: Listen to that, the crowd is ecstatic!

{The crowd erupts in cheers.}

James: Finally, both men slowly start moving. They get to their feet, and
Jeff gets a sudden burst of energy.

John: Well that energy did not last long.

James: He is, knocked back down with the monitor. Johnson slammed it across
his face as Jeff came charging at him. He falls to the floor spitting out a
mouth full of blood. I think I saw a tooth fly out of Jeff's mouth on that
one.

John: Josh Johnson has the monitor's wire is flings it down, whipping Jeff
Cross with the monitor.

James: Damn it, first our table now our monitors?

John: Will these people ever stop? Johnson stalks around Cross.  He begins
to pick him up.

James: Low blow by Cross! Johnson goes down hard!

John: Jeff Cross nails Johnson with a couple punches, and then raises a knee
to his face. Johnson snaps backwards, and his head hits the concrete hard.

James: That could be it!

John: Cross picks up Johnson and slides him into the ring.  Dark Krystal
follows him.

James: Whom does he think he is fooling?  She will not make the count!

John: Wait, he is putting Johnson into a sharpshooter!

James: That sneaky bastard,

John: Cross-puts Johnson in a sharpshooter, but Johnson is still out cold.
Dark Krystal looks around, not sure of what to do.  She walks over to
Johnson and lifts one arm up. It falls.

James: Two more arm drops and we have a new champion!

John:  she picks the arm up again. It drops.

James: Dark Krystal is obviously worried here. Who would not?

{Krystal s face contorts with rage.}

John: NO, She just kicked Jeff Cross in the back of the leg.

James: He releases the hold!  We are still going here!

John: Krystal drags Johnson s body and drapes it over Jeff Crosses.

James: Here it is folks!

One
Two
Kick out

John: He kicked out!

James: No,

John: Krystal yells.  Cross-is getting up.  He runs over to Dark Krystal,
yelling at her.  She is, backed into a corner.

James: But here comes Johnson who is back up, goes for the clothesline, but
Cross-moved!

John: Krystal was, hit right in the throat with that clothesline.  She is
down!  He must not have seen her. Johnson turns to Cross.  The walk over and
get face to face and stare each other down.  The crowd is on its feet.

James: Punches back and forth, Cross blocks, DDT!  He is leaving the ring;
Johnson is holding his head.  Why is he coming over here?

John: Johnson grabs a steel chair and walks back to the ring.  He slides in.
Johnson is on his knees.

James:  Cross-is going for the kill shot here, he raises it over his head

John: Here it comes

James: As it s coming down Johnson kicks it back into Cross s face.
Cross-is down!  Cross-is down!

John: But so is Johnson.  That took a lot out of him.

James:  Krystal is back up though.  She looks around and begins the ten
counts.

One
Two
Three
Four

John: What happens if this is a double count out?

James: A draw I would guess. Krystal stops the count.  She goes over and
picks up Johnson

John: What a bitch,

James: I think she is being quite fair.  She is propping him up in the
corner, and now goes back to her count.

Five
Six
Seven

John:  Cross-is getting up, He is still alive. Cross-gets to his knees and
Krystal looks exasperated.  She stops the count and glares at Cross.

James: If looks could kill, they would both be dead right now.

John: Johnson is on his feet, but he gets out of the ring.  Cross picks up
the chair and taunts Johnson. What is he looking for?

James: Johnson reaches underneath the ring and pulls out  Yes!  A bat
covered with barbed wire.

John: Johnson smiles and looks at Cross.  The smiles disappear when he sees
Cross smiling back.  Cross-throws the chair out of the ring at Johnson, He
avoids it but

James: Cross just ran and dove between the ropes!  He nails Johnson in the
gut with his body!  That impact was amazing!

John: They may both be dead now!

James: But they are not.  Cross-gets up after a couple second, Dark Krystal
is now on the outside.  Cross-throws the barbed wire bats into the ring.

John: He picks up Johnson and puts him in Tombstone pile driver position.

James: If he hits this, it is over.

John: Not so fast,

James: Indeed, Johnson s' kicking his legs and he reverses the pile driver.
Now Cross-is about to be, no!  Cross flips over and gets back into control!
He hits the tombstone pile driver!

John: Johnson is out cold.  Krystal is shocked. Dark Krystal is shaking her
head in disbelief.  Cross-is wasting no time.  He picks the chair up and
positions it on the floor.  He picks up the body of Johnson and sets him up
for a traditional pile driver.

James: Krystal is getting in his face!  He lets go of Johnson and grabs
Krystal!

John: He throws her into the ring post.  She falls down like a ton of
bricks! Cross picks up Johnson again and puts his head between his legs.

James: He is going for the pile driver again, so help him god.  He reverses
and back body drops Cross onto the concrete!  This match is so extreme. I
have not seen something like this for ages!

John:  Did you see what Johnson just did?

James:  Cross-is out cold, it would seem.  Johnson is up, and he is grinning
from ear to ear, blood running out of his mouth, and cuts abundant on his
face.  He eyes the steel chair and casually walks over to pick it up, Cross
beings to stir.

John:  Cross-, is, stirring here.  He is getting to his knees.  Johnson
climbs out to the ring apron, seeing Jeff getting to his knees.  From the
opposite sides, Johnson runs, and nails Cross in the head with a chair!

James:  MAN that sounded like it hurt, And Johnson is not finished!

John:  Cross-is out  there is blood spilling from his mouth, and onto the
floor.  The fans at ringside are, a little grossed out, it would seem.

James:  Johnson drops the chair, and begins to lift Cross-up.  He has him in
a doubled over position.  Johnson then, kicks the back of Cross- s knee,
putting Cross back on his knees, and Real Deal just drives Cross-' face into
the steel chair at an alarming rate!

John:  Where, the hell is Krystal?

James:  She has perched on the top turnbuckle, John.

John:  Oh  meanwhile,  Johnson locks Cross, who is really out cold, into an
STF, cinching in whatever pain threshold might be left.

James:  After Johnson gets through with this set of destruction, what do you
think will happen?  Do you think he will just toss him into the ring and
cover him?

John:  OH SHIT,

James:  JOHNSON IS BACK UP AND HAS A STEEL CHAIR IN HAND!

John:  HE JUST BROUGHT THAT CHAIR DOWN ONTO AN UNCONSCIOUS JEFF CROSS!

James:  HOLY SHIT, something needs to be, done here!

John:  Krystal is smiling!

James:  Josh has that chair and he brings it down AGAIN!

John:  CROSS-IS GOING TO DIE!

James:  AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN,

John:  I do not think I have ever seen Josh Johnson like this before

James:  Well, what do you expect?  The man has had so much taken from him in
the past two months; you would think he had a little bit of pent up
frustration, right?

John:  DAMN, ONE MORE TIME,

James:  So I think you might be able to understand where he is coming from
here

John:  James, no matter what you say, no man should be, put through this

James:  Just imagine if that were Skull, John.  Think about what Johnson
must be feeling right now!  All of that hatred and contempt for Nick Davis,
all he did for two months was to taunt Josh Johnson, and once Josh beat him,
he tried to convince him that Skull laid down for Real Deal!

John:  Well, in all actuality, I do not see any mistruth in that

James:  Oh, shut your fucking mouth, would you?  How would you feel if Skull
kidnapped your wife, huh John?  Would you like that?  OH!  Josh with a DDT
onto that chair!  It is, covered in blood!

John:  Hey, you leave my wife out of this.  You are just mad at me because I
fucked your mom.  Johnson is not worth the dog shit in my yard!

James:  JOHN that is YOUR world champion how could you even says such a
thing.  Johnson is a pinnacle of today's working class hero!

John:  Yeah, working class  right that is why he is living in high-rise
apartments and condominiums all over the United States.

James:  Ugh, you make me sick sometimes you know that.  And Johnson again
with a chair shot!  How many is that now?  8?

John:  HEY KRYSTAL, WHY NOT GET OFF YOUR LAZY BITCH ASS AND DO SOMETHING
ABOUT THIS!

James:  JOHN, Watch your mouth!  I would not be surprised if Krystal did not
come down here and knocked the shit out of you  but wait, she is getting off
the turnbuckle.  She has come down, as Johnson is administering some more
punishment to Jeff Cross.

John:  Good, it's about time that bitch did something.  Women, they are good
for nothing.

James:  Mary, I hope you are listening to what your husband just said.

John:  OH SHIT!  We are on camera right. Can we go back and edit that out?

James:  We are quite live, there, John Boy.  Mary, not only does he think
that bitches be tripping' but when he has caught red handed, he wants to go
back in time, as if nothing ever happened.  I would not be surprised if John
has not cheated on you.

John:  JAMES, Are you trying to get me in trouble?  Let us get back to the
match!  Uh- Um- Johnson and Cross-, who is still out is back in the ring.
Johnson goes up to the top rope, in the middle, and tries a senton bomb, but
Cross BARELY rolls out of the way.

James:  Wow, did that EVER catch Johnson by surprise!  He is livid!

John:  You can say that again!

James:  Wow, did that EVER catch Johnson by surprise!  He is livid!

John:  Dude, I hate you.  I hate you so much.

James:  Heh heh heh, Johnson is back on his feet, and waiting for Jeff
Cross, who in his defense, should be quite dead right now.  Real Deal takes
off after Cross, who ducks.  Real Deal bounces off the ropes, and is, met
with a massive elbow to the chin by Jeff Cross!  Real Deal hits the mat
hard.

John:  Serves that little punk bitch right.  He is nothing, new world
champion, right here.

James:  Cross with the cover

One,
Two
KICK OUT

James:  The fans come to their feet, in support of the Real Deal as he kicks
out from a hard elbow to the chin.  Real Deal gets to his feet really,
quick, and as Jeff turns   Real Deal, kick to the gut!  END GAME (Vertical
Suplex into an ace crusher)!

John:  How he got Jeff Cross up is totally beyond me

James:  Cover,

One,
Two,
Thr-

Kick out

John:  Cross-kicked out of the End Game!  That was amazing!  The Real Deal
cannot believe it!

James:  The Real Deal is FURIOUS!  Cross-is up, Cross with the Prodigal
Lock!

John:  REAL DEAL IS GOING TO TAP!

James:  Krystal is checking Johnson here, to see if he is going to submit.
Johnson is grasping, inching ever so closely to the ropes.  Cross-is looking
quite tired, almost as though he will give up the hold.

John:  You have to remember, you namby pamby bastard that Cross already
wrestled tonight.  He went to hell and back with the Flying Dutchman and the
Fist.

James:  Yeah, yeah, that still should not deter him.  This is the biggest
opportunity he has had in his career.  He should not be laying down on the
job, especially with the company's most heralded prize on the line.

John:  I was just saying, is all?

James:  Anyway, Krystal is checking Johnson, who is looking like he is about
to pass out.  She lifts his arm  it drops  lifts it again  and the Real Deal
drops again   One last time  it dr- no, he has a burst of energy, and he
gets to a knee, and heads to the ropes, breaking the hold!

John:  Jeff Cross thought he had it there, you can see the disappointment
and anger in his face.  He is up, and Johnson is seemingly gasping for air.
Cross-, looming over Real Deal picks him up and slams him down with a
textbook body slam.  Way to go Jeff!

James:  The Real Deal is looking the worse for wear here...  which is odd,
considering the massive head trauma that was, caused by the steel chairs.
Real Deal is breathing quite heavily, and Krystal checks on him.

John:  You think that might make Tara jealous.

James:  Unless she was a child, I do not see why it would.

John:  Whatever, you are ALWAYS right.  I do not know why I even begin to
argue with you.

James:  Yeah, fuck you pal.  Jeff Cross has Real Deal up on his shoulders.
He runs him into the turnbuckle, but Johnson pushes out and sends Cross-into
the turnbuckle.  Johnson grabs Cross from behind and nails a VICIOUS half
nelson suplex that folds Cross up like an accordion!

John:  Cross-may really is, injured here.  That could have hurt his neck.

James:  Real Deal puts Cross in the sharpshooter, and as Cross inches to the
ropes, Real Deal pulls him into the middle of the ring, and he cinches it in
even harder.  Krystal checks on Cross.  No give, The Real Deal just lets go,
letting Cross slump almost lifelessly into the middle of the ring.  Real
Deal smirks, and goes to the top of Cross-' body, and kicks him in the side
of the head, busting him open at the temple.

John:  This ring is, covered in blood.  This is what the SHOOT Project is
all about, right here.

James:  That is right, overcoming hardship and working through the blood,
the sweat, and the tears, to succeed, and to ultimately, stay alive.

{All the sudden, flames of fire burst from the stage }

James: WHAT, THE FUCK,

John: What is going on this time?

{The Conspirators, Sebastian Crow, Rancid, Tammy Lee, and Randy Wayne Long
step out from behind the curtain wearing all blacks and trench coats. Their
trench coats are, buttoned up. Shades cover their eyes. Then suddenly, they
split to separate sides and Roland the Dark approaches the stage  he walks
down the ramp-way, smiling at the action.}

James: What, the hell is this?

John: I do not know! Josh Johnson steps out of the ring. He is going to
confront Roland himself! Josh and Roland stomp toward each other  wait;
Roland grabs hold of Johnson and pushes him back to the ground! Josh Johnson
fights back though! Like a true champion, Josh Johnson charges at Roland
again. Roland catches his bare hands around Johnson s neck and tosses him
through the guardrail! Jesus Christ, Roland grabs a-hold of the top rope and
steps over

James: Jeff Cross stands to his feet. It looks as if Roland has come to Jeff
Crosses aid! The Conspirators have come to help Jeff Cross win this thing!

John:  OH NO, THEY HAVE NOT, ROLAND GRABS A-HOLD OF JEFF CROSSES THROAT, HE
BRINGS  HE BRINGS A HAMMER FROM HIS TRENCH COAT AND STRIKES JEFF CROSS IN
BETWEEN THE EYES!

{The Conspirators continue to watch from the stage, not moving an inch.}

James: What, the hell is going on here?

John: Now, Josh Johnson is back in the ring! He throws a shot toward Roland
Roland catches it, he holds his arm there  why, I wonder

James: WAIT A SECOND, DARK KRYSTAL FROM BEHIND, SHE JUST LOW-BLOWED JOSH
JOHNSON!

John: WHAT,

James: SHE JUST LOW-BLOWED JOSH JOHNSON, MY GOD, WHAT, THE HELL IS
HAPPENING

{Camera s glance back at the Conspirators, they are laughing, yet watching.}

John: Look at Roland! Roland holds Johnson  Dark bounces off the ropes, she
comes back, and, KRYSTAL CUTTER!

James: Now, Roland covers Johnson over Cross  this is ridicoulas

One
Two
Three

**Ding, Ding, Ding**

{ I Stand Alone  by GODSMACK blares over the pa speakers as Dark and Roland
high-five in the ring. They smile at the carnage. Dark exchanges a smile
with Sebastian as he nods his head and signals for them to come.}

James: My God, this was not right. This was not right at all!

John:  James, both men are knocked senseless! This whole time, Dark Krystal
was playing Johnson just for this particular moment!

James: Jesus  this is not right  folks, thank you for joining us on
 Training Day   we will see you next week at Oblivion  shit

FADE OUT.

SHOOT Project Entertainment
A Daniel Jones/Jason Johnson Production
Date:	Sunday, April 28, 2002