The screen goes black, revealing once again the SHOOT Project Helmet, looming ominously over the skyline of Las Vegas, Nevada. "Miracle" by Nonpoint begins to play as the camera flies down onto the SHOOT Project Epicenter.
WHOOOOOOOOOA You better blow the whistle, ring the bell
The sound of a bell is heard, revealing the empty ring in the center of the SHOOT Project Epicenter Arena.
Train a little harder than you can or ever will
The opening shot is of the SHOOT Project World Heavyweight Championship belt, more aptly Azraith’s World Championship belt. A second shot of Trey Willett is shown, standing proudly at the entrance. A third shot of Sinnocence’s sexy waist can be seen, a droplet of sweat sliding into her belly button before the camera pans up to her face, where she is smirking.
You need to think fast
Cade Sydal is shown taking The Ox down, then quickly shown defeating Dan Stein. That is followed quickly by a shot of The UK Dragon hitting a high impact move on Jaime Alejandro.
This is our first but I guarantee it’ll be your last!
Pestalance, locked in a submission move, yelling at himself as he is almost ready to tap out. Osbourne Kilminster, slowly lifting his head to look directly into the camera.
Got news if you think you bad
The next image is Donovan King, glaring at the camera. It takes the viewer a moment to realize the dark shadow of OutKast is standing behind King, looking over his shoulder somewhat, only looking back with the side of his face with his brow furrowed. The camera switches to Johnny Patriot and the UK Dragon, looking at one another with slightly bemused expressions on their face.
All your other battles make me laugh
Lennox Ferguson is up next, his face a bloody crimson mask. He is screaming a primal scream at the camera, which switches quickly to Osbourne Kilminster, painstakingly locking in his submission on his own wife, Sinnocence.
You need to start runnin’…
Charles Brandon Magnus and ‘Big’ Buck Dresden pound their fists in unison in an empty ring, ready for their next challenge. They are shown with Jonas Coleman sneaking up behind them, putting his arms around both of their necks.
You’re standin’ on the tracks and the train is comin’!
Pestalance is shown, ripping the hood from his head, a grin on his face, only for the scene to shift to Jaime Alejandro, his head slowly lifting to face the camera as the shadows cascade around his shoulders.
NOWHERE TO GO
Mr. Heart is shown decimating Charles Brandon Magnus with a hard brass knuckle hit, quickly followed by Adrian Corazon lording over the fallen Trey Willett.
You need a miracle!
Azraith DeMitri is next, looking at both the SHOOT Project World Heavyweight Championship belts, dropping one to his feet and tossing the other on his shoulder.
Nothing’s gonna save you
Azrael Goeren’s arrival is shown, followed quickly by Jester Smiles standing side by side with Donovan King over a fallen Azraith.
And I’ll scream it from the top of the world!
X-Calibur is shown laughing with Azrael Goeren next, both men enjoying the carnage they have wrought against Rocky Stellar. Stellar is shown next, catching Goeren unawares and nailing the Stellar Drop.
Whatcha gonna do when it’s just me and you!
Donovan King nailing the Dealbreaker on Azraith is shown.
Whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do!
Sinnocence forcing Cade Sydal to submit to the Iron Maiden.
Whatcha gonna do when it’s just me and you!
Dexter and Ox being separated from their brawl is shown.
Whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do!
Cronos Diamante is next, standing in the center of an empty ring, a red spotlight shining down on him.
Whatcha gonna do when it’s just me and you!
Jester Smiles hitting the Punchline on Sinnocence.
Whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do!
The arena is shown fully, the fans screaming as loudly as possible as the SHOOT Project Helmet is shown one final time.
Whatcha gonna do when it’s just me and you!
Whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do!
Samantha Coil: The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first…
"Stilly Fly" by The Devil Wears Prada hits, and out from the back steps FLASH Dynamite and Kid Lightning. They make their way down toward the ring to a heavily mixed reaction.
Samantha Coil: … at a combined weight of 420 pounds, from Metropolis, Illinois! They are FLASH Dynamite and Kid Lightning! The FLYYYYYYINNNNNNNNNNG AVENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGERRRRRRRS!
The two of them make their way into the ring as their music fades out slowly, only to be replaced by Rob Zombie’s "Living Dead Girl (Subliminal Seduction Mix)" and the fans begin to cheer loudly.
Samantha Coil: Opposite them, first from Las Vegas, Nevada! SIIIIIIIINNOCENCE!
As she’s announced, Sinnocence steps out from the back with her right arm raised. She smirks down at the Flying Avengers from the top of the ramp as she begins to make her way down to the ring.
Eryk Masters: Interesting dynamic we have here tonight in this tag team match.
Other Guy: I’d say both sides match up pretty evenly in terms of speed and power, but the edge has to go to the Avengers. They’ve been a tag team since day one!
As Sinn makes it down to the bottom of the ramp, she stops and her music fades out. "Gimme Shelter" by The Rolling Stones starts up, and the fans begin to cheer loudly!
Eryk Masters: Wow! Our fans in Germany are apparently rabid Saint fans!
Jaime Alejandro, The Saint and Iron Fist Champion, steps out from the back raising his title belt high inj the air as the fans cheer louder.
Samantha Coil: And her partner, from San Antonio, Texas! He is The SHOOT Project Iron Fist Champion! "The Saint" JAAAAAAAAAAIME AAAAAAAAALEJAAAAAAANDROOOOOOOOOO!
As Jaime makes his way down to the ring, Samantha Coil gets out. Jaime hands his title belt to her as he reaches the bottom of the ramp, then he and Sinn slide into the ring together as they keep watchful eyes on the Flying Avengers. FLASH stares daggers into Jaime, before stepping out onto the apron when Sinn shows that she’ll be starting the match for her team, leaving Kid Lightning to start for the Avengers.
Other Guy: Looks like we’re going to start things off with the speed, E.
The bell sounds and both Kid Lightning and Sinnocence begin to walk a circle in the ring before coming together to lock-up, and Sinn immediately takes control by twisting under KL’s arm into a wristlock. KL starts to roll forward but handsprings off his right fist to his feet and turns toward Sinn before turning a one-hand cartwheel over her arms and when he lands on his feet he captures her left wrist and twists under it into a wristlock of his own!
Other Guy: Did you see that? Holy smokes, that was quick!
Eryk Masters: Holy smokes?
Other Guy: You know, super villains and all, right?
Sinn quickly rolls forward and nips up before falling back, tossing KL with an arm drag. KL quickly rolls to his feet just a little sooner than Sinn, and as she turns around he catches her with an arm drag before nipping up to his feet as she rolls through. KL turns and rushes at her, only for Sinn to drop to a knee and sweep his leg out from under him, she falls into a lateral press!
KL kicks out, shoving Sinn off of him and as she gets to her feet he swings through and sweeps her feet out from under her, he turns a full circle to sort of spiral down to a cover!
Sinn kicks out, pushing KL off of her, and both of them nip up to their feet and turn to face each other, as the fans applaud the fast-paced action.
Eryk Masters: What a way to kick things off tonight!
Other Guy: Are they even breathing?
KL and Sinn both start to circle, but as KL passes FLASH Dynamite he reaches out and tags KL’s shoulder, tagging himself in. KL reluctantly steps out of the ring as FLASH steps in and locks eyes with Sinn. FLASH points to Jaime Alejandro, but Sinn just shakes her head and comes rushing in at him! FLASH swings for a clothesline as Sinn gets closer, but she ducks under the arm and catches it, swinging her body around she wraps his arms up and rolls backward for a crucifix pin!
FLASH kicks out hard and rolls backward to his feet. Sinn scrambles to her feet and FLASH catches her with a boot to the gut! He grabs her arm and turns slightly before whipping her to her own corner. He points at Jaime before waving his hand, motioning for the Saint to get in.
Other Guy: He isn’t going to take no for an answer, is he?
Eryk Masters: He wants a piece of the Iron Fist champ, OG!
Jaime tags Sinn and steps through the ropes as she steps out. Jaime and FLASH begin to slowly circle the ring before locking up hard in the center of the ring, with FLASH using his size and power to back Jaime up into a neutral corner quickly. Referee Austin Linam orders a break as FLASH presses his arms in Jaime’s face, snarling at him as Linam counts. FLASH backs off at the count of four with his arms raised before flexing them and staring dead at the Saint, the flexing eliciting boos from the crowd.
Eryk Masters: FLASH Dynamite has a renewed look of intensity in his eyes tonight!
Other Guy: The Saint said some unsavory things about his sister in some interviews, E. I’d say he’s looking to make him eat those words.
Jaime rushes out of the corner, right into another lock-up with FLASH, and as FLASH backs him to a corner, Jaime turns it around at the last second, putting FLASH in the corner. Jaime breaks cleanly and backs up, smirking at the former superhero. FLASH runs out of the corner at Jaime, and Jaime quickly drops, catching FLASH with a drop toehold! Jaime floats over FLASH’s back, right into a side headlock, and FLASH starts pushing to his feet, using his size once again to his advantage, making it to a stand quickly while the Saint still has the side headlock locked in. Not for long, though, as FLASH lifts Jaime up and throws him forward off of him, Jaime turns and just manages to land on his feet!
Other Guy: That is just scary strong, though. Alejandro isn’t a small man, folks, and FLASH is only barely bigger!
Eryk Masters: Jaime landed on his feet, though. You can tell this isn’t the first time he’s faced someone bigger and stronger than he is.
FLASH sneers at Jaime and swings both arms at him for a Polish Hammer, but Jaime ducks under them and hits the ropes! Sinn tags his back as he rebounds back and dives low with a dropkick to FLASH’s knee! FLASH drops to his other knee as Sinn springboards to the top rope and off, turning she catches FLASH with a cross body while he’s kneeling, taking him to the canvas!
FLASH kicks out and Sinn immediately hits the ropes, and as FLASH gets to his feet she leaps up and catches him with a hurricanrana, rolling through his legs and hooking both legs for another pin!
Eryk Masters: Sinnocence is on a roll!
FLASH kicks out again and Sinn scrambles quickly to her feet as FLASH is a little slower. Sinn hits the ropes again and rushes at FLASH and leaps at him for a flying head scissors, but he tilt-a-whirls her all the way through and catches her head, posting one hand off her hip he snaps down quickly with a brainbuster out of the tilt-a-whirl!
Other Guy: Oh my God! Did you see that?!
FLASH turns to cover Sinn lazily, staring at Jaime as he does so.
Sinn kicks out and FLASH pulls her to her feet by the hair before reaching out and tagging in KL. FLASH whips Sinn off the ropes as KL slingshots over the ropes, FLASH meets Sinn on the rebound with a high back body drop as KL runs under her and cradles her head and neck, with a neckbreaker!
Other Guy: OH! The Flying Avengers are firing on all cylinders tonight!
Eryk Masters: You’re not kidding! Where did that come from?!
Kid Lightning floats into a cover, hooking both of Sinn’s legs!
Sinn kicks out, and KL swings his body up to his feet fluidly, staring down at Sinn. He reaches down and pulls her to her feet by her wrist, before twisting under it and whipping her to his corner and rushing in with a running forearm smash! KL tags FLASH and pulls Sinn out of the corner as FLASH gets in the ring, KL whips her off the ropes and runs, catching her with a drop toe hold! FLASH hits the ropes off to the side of her and leaps up, landing with a big Senton splash across her back!
Eryk Masters: Things aren’t looking so good for Sinnocence and the Iron Fist Champion right now!
Other Guy: You can say that again!
FLASH turns Sinn over and hooks her legs.
Alejandro dives into the ring and clubs FLASH in the back with both arms! He backs out of the ring as the official admonishes him, and FLASH glares at him while he pulls Sinn back to her feet. FLASH backs Sinn to the ropes and whips her off. He rushes to meet her off the ropes with a back elbow, but she ducks under it! She rebounds off the ropes as FLASH lurches off balance and turns to try and catch Sinn again, but she jumps up and plants a spinning wheel kick in his face and they both go down!
Other Guy: Sinnocence just kicked FLASH’s teeth into the third row!
Eryk Masters: Maybe not quite that extreme, but this is definitely the opening she needed!
Sinn starts to crawl toward her corner, as FLASH turns and reaches toward his own! FLASH tags Kid Lightning, and then Sinn’s hand slaps into Jaime’s! Jaime is through the ropes as KL slingshots over the top rope! KL rushes at Alejandro, only to be caught by a running lariat! FLASH pulls himself up on the ropes and turns around, right into a Yakuza kick from the Saint and he goes back down!
Eryk Masters: Jaime Alejandro is cleaning house!
Kid Lightning starts to push back to his feet as Alejandro turns around and grabs him from behind hooking both arms, Alejandro snaps back with a Dragon Suplex, dropping KL on his neck, the young man folds like an accordion as Jaime pushes back to his feet with his arms out wide. FLASH is backup, holding his chin and as Jaime turns around, FLASH spins a full circle and drives both arms into his face with a roaring Polish Hammer!
Other Guy: A roaring Hammer of Justice!
Eryk Masters: Jaime Alejandro’s momentum just go stopped dead in its tracks!
FLASH glares down at Jaime, paying no attention as Sinn is back to her feet. Sinn leaps up on FLASH’s back, wrapping her arms around his neck in a rear-naked choke, she body scissors her legs around his waist!
Eryk Masters: Sinnocence has the Iron Maiden locked on, though!
Other Guy: But both FLASH and Sinnocence are illegal participants!
FLASH reaches back, trying to get Sinn off of his back, but soon drops to a knee as he starts to fade! KL pushes to his feet, cradling his neck as he spots Sinn putting his partner to sleep! Kid Lightning takes off toward the ropes and springboards off the middle rope, backflipping he catches Sinn by her head, in an inverted facelock and drops quickly to a reverse DDT, pulling her off of FLASH’s back!
Other Guy: SONIC BOOM!
Kid Lightning pushes to his feet, holding his neck still, and spots Alejandro and moves toward him. KL pulls Jaime off the canvas and whips him off the ropes, but Jaime ducks under the whipping arm and pulls KL into a knee to the gut! Jaime hooks KL in a front facelock and lifts him up, holding him in the air for a couple seconds, before dropping suddenly and driving KL down on the top of his head!
Eryk Masters: Hashimoto Surprise!
Jaime turns and hooks both of KL’s legs!
Austin Linam signals for the bell, and the fans cheer as “Gimme Shelter” by the Rolling Stones hits again. Alejandro pushes to his feet slowly, raising his arms in the air, as Austin Linam brings the Iron Fist Title to him.
Samantha Coil: Here are your winners! At a time of 17 minutes and 48 seconds! SINNOCENCE and the SHOOT Project Iron Fist Champion, "The Saaint" JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIME AAAAAAAAAAAALEJAAAAAAAAANDROOOOOOOOO!
The cameras cut to the back revealing Ben Jackman storming through the bowels of O2 World Hamburg Arena a steel folding chair clutched in his hand. Jackman turned left around a blind corner into another long hallway, this one lined with doors.
A thin smile spread across Jackman’s face as his gait slowed to something more closely resembling a stroll, as he passed each door his eyes slid up to check the nameplate on the door.
One by one he read each door as he walked by, his grip tightening and loosening around the chair in his hand with each successive step until he found the door he was looking for.
Cade Sydal. SHOOT Project World Heavyweight Champion.
Jackman steps up to the door, the smile faded quickly from his face, replaced almost immediately with a grimace as his free hand slid up and over the scar on his forehead. The scar that the title belt on the other side of this door had ripped into his forehead.
Jackman’s right hand reached out and took the door knob, the thought of simply throwing the door open and getting some measure of revenge screaming to the front of his mind, but that wasn’t what he was here for. If it came to that, there would be time later. But for now, he’d give Cade just one more chance to save himself.
Jackman turned away from the door, unfolded the chair, and sat it against the wall directly across from Cade Sydal’s locker room door. Jackman stared at the door for a long moment, the urge to throw the door open still pulling at the edge of this thoughts, but instead Jackman backed away from the door, the thin smile returning to his face as he sat down in the folding chair and propped his feet up on the doorframe to wait.
Jackman closed his eyes, and began to quietly whistle the tune to Guns N’ Roses’ “Patience.” as the cameras fade out.
Cut to the ring, where Samantha Coil stands tall in its center, raising the microphone to her mouth.
Samantha Coil: The following contest is scheduled for one fall with a 15-minute time limit!
The arena lights dim, and an old fashioned, black and white film countdown hits the screen, the film flickering and a beep heard after every digit.
Nachtmystium’s "Ghosts of Grace" cues up at the snare triplet leading into the first verse, the melodic and driving psychedelic black metal bringing forth Corey Lazarus, Hiro Takawa, and Gregory Price (in that order) from behind the curtain, a spotlight hovering over them as they make their way down the ramp, Laz slapping high-fives and bumping fists with fans in the front row as Hiro calmly walks to the ring.
Samantha Coil: Introducing first, at a combined weight of 450 pounds…
Corey hops up onto the apron as Hiro slides in under the bottom rope with Price walking over to their corner, chomping away on his gum.
Samantha Coil: Being accompanied to the ring by Gregory Price, they are the team of Corey Lazarus and Hiro Takawa…
Corey holds his arms out to his side, nodding, and then steps between the ropes and into the ring, walking into its center to drop to a knee, his arms stretched out to his side again. Hiro runs the ropes, stopping only to roll to a crouched position next to his partner.
Samantha Coil: …FRONTLINE II TURBO!!
"Ghosts of Grace" dies down as both Corey and Hiro rise to their feet, backing up into their corner.
Eryk Masters: Frontline II TURBO, you have to believe, are quickly on their way to becoming contenders to the SHOOT Project World Tag Team titles that the Bad Ass Brotherhood currently hold.
Other Guy: What do you mean "currently hold"? The Bitch Ass Brotherhood hold them at the moment, possession is nine tenths of the law, and…
Eryk Masters: Yeah, yeah…
MSTRKRFT’s "1000 Cigarettes" cues up, bringing forth a solid chorus of boos from the German crowd. Ray Valjean and Jay Skylar trot out from behind the curtain, basking in their pseudo-adulation as they raise the SHOOT Project World Tag Team title belts above their head.
Samantha Coil: Introducing next, at a combined weight of 453 pounds…
Ray pats Jay on the shoulder as they make their way down the ramp, stopping to point to a fan in the front row holding a "VAS IST SCHWEINEHUND" sign. Skylar shakes his head, wagging a finger at the fan, and then kisses the Tag belt before the two move on.
Samantha Coil: The team of Ray Valjean and Jay Skylar…
Ray and Jay both step up onto the apron, and Ray steps through the ropes as Jay slingshots himself over them, landing on his feet and doing a quick hop before striking the Karate Kid crane pose, pointing at Hiro. Takawa looks on, emotionless, and Corey shakes his head, smirking.
Samantha Coil: …VAS!!!
"1000 Cigarettes" dies down as Ray and Jay hand the Tag Team titles off to the timekeeper and Samantha Coil exits the ring. Referee Dennis Heflin motions for one man from either team to take to the apron, prompting Corey to step out in the F2T corner and Jay to step out in the VAS corner. He signals for the bell…
Eryk Masters: And here we go!
Hiro and Ray stare each other down, Ray stretching himself out as Hiro does the same across from him. They meet in the center of the ring and Hiro goes for a lock up but Ray nails a pair of right hands, stunning him. Valjean whips him into the ropes but Hiro stops dead in his tracks, quickly rolling forward and nailing the back of his heel against the top of Ray’s head, sending him down to the canvas and allowing Takawa to quickly make a cover.
Other Guy: And one half of the rightful Tag Team champions kicks out DEFIANTLY!
Eryk Masters: Only a one-count off of that Koppo Kick.
Hiro locks Ray into a side headlock immediately, wrenching it in. Ray grabs a handful of Hiro’s hair, pulling back, and Dan Heflin admonishes him for it. It doesn’t phase Hiro, though, as he just grinds the headlock in a bit more.
Eryk Masters: Valjean up to his feet now…
Other Guy: A few shots to the kidneys!
Hiro grits his teeth from the dull pain in his lower back following a trio of forearms from Valjean, slightly loosening his grip on the headlock, and Ray takes his opening to stomp on Hiro’s foot. Takawa breaks the headlock, stepping away, and Ray shoots in, taking him down with a clothesline.
Eryk Masters: Tag to Jay Skylar…
Skylar enters and nails a pair of forearms into Hiro’s face, dazing him enough to grab his arm in a full-arm dragon twist. Hiro slaps his shoulder to keep the feeling in it before rolling forward and popping up to his feet, reversing the hold into one of his own. Jay drops to a knee from the pain and rolls forward, looking for a reversal of his own…
Eryk Masters: …but Hiro rolls through!
True enough, Takawa rolls with Jay, keeping the full-arm dragon twist intact. Skylar drops to his knees again, allowing Hiro to nail a pair of stiff kicks to his chest. Takawa drags Jay over to the F2T corner, allowing Corey to make a blind tag.
Other Guy: Here comes Corey, who you may remember from such direct-to-DVD films as Transmorphers 3 and Snakes on a Space Shuttle
Eryk Masters: …realy? Snakes on a Space Shuttle
Other Guy: Oh yeah. Marvelous film.
Laz springboards off of the top rope and comes down with a downward elbow to the top of Jay’s head as Hiro takes to the apron. Corey shoves Jay into the F2T corner, flashing him his trademark devilish smirk, and then unloads with a series of forearms to the face and clinch knees to his midsection.
Danny Heflin: Get him off the ropes, 1! 2! 3! 4!
Corey whips Jay across the ring into the VAS corner and then drops to a knee, pointing at Ray and waving him into the ring. Ray sneers, shrugs, and then tags Jay’s hand, stepping between the ropes and staring across at Laz. Corey rises up, raising a clenched fist and an open hand, and Ray steps towards him, raising an eyebrow. Laz goes for a lock up but Ray ducks underneath it, jabbing a thumb into Corey’s eye the moment that Laz turns around.
Other Guy: There you have it. Blind men can’t see!
Valjean takes Corey down with a drop toehold and then floats over, locking on a Camel Clutch. Ray quickly transitions this into a rear naked choke, grapevining his legs around Corey’s midsection. Laz rolls over so that Ray’s shoulders are pinned down, using his feet to push himself up and bridge it into a pinfall attempt.
Valjean breaks the rear naked choke and rolls to his side, looking to put it back on, but Corey gets a grip on the bottom rope. Ray laughs and nails a crossface punch before cinching in a chinlock, fish hooking his fingers into Corey’s nostrils.
Danny Heflin: He’s on the ropes, break it up! 1! 2! 3!
Ray acts surprised at Heflin, staring at him wide-eyed, and then breaks the hold at 4 before pushing himself to his feet. He looks out at the disapproving crowd, holding his arms up to bask in their jeers.
Eryk Masters: It doesn’t look like Ray Valjean has too many fans here in Deutschland.
Other Guy: Oh, don’t worry, he’s got plenty of them. They just didn’t have enough money to buy tickets tonight.
Ray places a few quick kicks into Corey’s ribcage before palming his face and shoving him into the mat. Lazarus face contorts with brief rage as Ray backs up, laughing, and he rushes to his feet, slamming forearm after knee after right hand after back elbow into Ray, driving him into a neutral corner to a roar of approval. Corey backs away as Ray drops down, holding his cheek, and Laz rushes in, nailing a stiff knife-edge chop to Valjean’s face.
Other Guy: …the face?!
Eryk Masters: That’s certainly pretty unique, to say the least. It’s just too bad Jay Skylar’s been doing it for years.
Lazarus brings Ray out of the corner, blowing a kiss to Jay Skylar on the apron, and then locks him into a head and arm hold…
Eryk Masters: Corey’s looking for a Uranage suplex…!
…but Ray elbows out of it and dives into the VAS corner, tagging in Skylar. Jay springboards off of the top rope and connects with a clothesline that knocks Corey down onto the apron. Skylar reaches over the top and brings Laz to his feet, suplexing him back into the ring before floating over into a lateral press, shoving his forearm into Corey’s face.
Lazarus kicks out with authority, but Skylar barely reacts with little else but a light slap to Corey’s face. He brings Laz to his feet and whips him into the ropes, ducking down for a back body drop, but Lazarus turns around mid-step and backflips over Skylar, landing on his feet behind him. Skylar turns to face him and gets whipped into the F2T corner. Lazarus charges in, drilling a rising knee into Jay’s jaw before tagging out to Hiro. Takawa climbs to the top rope and Corey drags Ray out of the corner, setting him up for a piledriver. Ray Valjean, however, has other plans, and rushes across the ring, planting a Yakuza Kick to the back of Corey’s skull that sends him tumbling onto the ring apron.
Other Guy: And THAT is why VAS are the rightful Tag Team champions: pure and downright brilliant teamwork.
Eryk Masters: And THIS is why Frontline II TURBO have been causing a stir in the tag ranks since their debut!
Takawa re-adjusts before leaping off of the top rope, drilling a diving knee into Ray’s face.
Eryk Masters: Diving Busaiku Knee!
Other Guy: Jay Skylar breaks it up! He shouldn’t have had to, though, because Ray wasn’t the legal man, but hey, whatever…
Skylar brings Hiro up to his feet and kicks him in the knee, dropping him down to one. Jay hits the ropes and whips off the Ugly Stick, rolling Hiro over and hooking a leg.
Corey reaches through the ropes and pulls Jay off of Hiro by the ankle, but that brings about Ray Valjean and the Kickback to the Future, sending Corey flying off of the apron and onto the floor. Gregory Price rushes over, checking on his client, and Ray slides out of the ring, shoving Price to the side to put some boots into Corey’s face. Skylar brings Takawa up to his feet and sends him into the corner, charging in and looking for a Stinger Splash, but Hiro raises both of his knees up, knocking the wind out of Jay. Skylar backs up and drops to his knees, gasping for air, and then gets up and turns around, looking for Ray as Lazarus begins fighting his way to his feet on the outside. Skylar regains his wind and looks to join the fray outside, but Takawa rushes up behind him, surprising him with an inverted ‘rana that plants Jay on the top of his head. At ringside, Corey drills some downward elbows into Ray’s head, but Valjean nails him with a chop to the throat and a Russian Legsweep into the guardrail.
Eryk Masters: Time Traveller by Hiro Takawa…AND HE’S GOING AIRBORN TO THE OUTSIDE!
Takawa immediately rises to his feet and charges towards Valjean on the outside, who has returned to stomping on Corey. Hiro flies over the top with a beautiful topé con hilo…
Other Guy: RAY VALJEAN PULLED GREGORY PRICE IN THE WAY!!
Takawa crashes down on top of he and Corey’s agent, causing Ray to smile before he slides back into the ring. Corey pulls himself to his feet with the apron and slides back in, getting an elbow into the back of his neck from Valjean for doing so.
Eryk Masters: Hiro’s come to on the outside, but it doesn’t look like Price will anytime soon.
Other Guy: Good. We can use his hair to clean up the rest of the mess in the Gulf of Mexico.
Valjean brings Corey to his feet and doubles him over with a knee to the midsection before pulling him into the Valjean Driver. He motions for Skylar, still knocked loopy from the Time Traveller, to make the cover, and Jay crawls over, doing so.
Eryk Masters: Hiro makes the save!
Takawa shoves Jay off of Corey and then leaps up, charging into Ray and knocking him down onto the apron with a Dashing Elbow. Lazarus pulls himself up to his feet, holding the back of his neck, and brings Jay up to his feet before drilling a low roundhouse kick with his right leg into Jay’s femoral artery, a mid-roundhouse kick to his ribcage with his left leg, and then sandwiches Jay’s head with a downward elbow thrust from his right arm into his crown and a rising knee to his jaw with his right leg.
Eryk Masters: Combo #5!!
Jay drops to a knee, his eyes rolling around in his head, and Corey nods to Takawa.
Eryk Masters: This could be the end…
Corey goes to bring Jay up into an Electric Chair position, but Ray Valjean dives through the ropes and hooks him down with a powerful lariat, both men spilling out of the ring. Skylar drops to a knee, holding his head, and Takawa rises to his feet on the top rope, turning around before leaping off and nailing a Phoenix Double Stomp to the top of Skylar’s head.
Other Guy: BEAUTIFUL Omega Burst Zero-Five!!
The bell chimes as Hiro gets to his feet in the ring, catching his breath. Price comes to on the outside, holding his head, and Corey levels Valjean with a high roundhouse kick to the skull before sliding back in to celebrate with Hiro. "Ghosts of Grace" cues back up as Corey and Hiro both get their arms raised in victory, and Ray pulls Skylar out of the ring, making a note to grab the SHOOT Project Tag Team titles from their corner and slinging them over their shoulders.
Samantha Coil: Your winners of the match…FRONTLINE II TURBO!!
Eryk Masters: Great win from F2T! I love these guys!
Other Guy: And VAS escapes with their SHOOT Project Tag Team title belts.
Eryk Masters: Their UNLAWFULLY CLAIMED SHOOT Project Tag Team Championship belts…
The cameras open to the locker room of one Thomas Manchester Black. TMB is relaxing in his chair as the camera crew walks in. He is drinking his water as the crew starts to set themselves up. Black tosses the empty bottle into the trash and looks at the Camera for a moment before speaking.
TMB: Do you know what makes us different from all the animals, Donnie.
TMB: Our ability to stay in control.
Thomas stands up.
TMB: Our ability to react with reason instead of primal urges.
TMB: That is the difference between me and you. And that is why you will never get to where you need to be. This is why you end up betraying those who try to help you Because you have no control…you have no reason. Therefore I have to say no to you, Donnie. I told you, that we will do things on my terms.
Black lets out a small giggle.
TMB: I bet you actually think you did something, didn’t you. You saw the bait dangling in front of you and you just had to jump at it. I knew you couldn’t help yourself, King. Heh, all you did was let me know that I’m in your head. All you did was let me know that I have the advantage.
TMB: But I’m not a hardheaded, person, King…maybe you can do something that is far beyond yourself and convince me with talk instead of fists. Do you think that even you can handle that, King. I’ll assume you know where you can find me. And I’ll be waiting to hear from you…toodles.
TMB kicks his feet up on the nearby table. The scene begins to fade as TMB waves the camera crew off.
The fans across the stadium all cheer as they get ready for the next great SHOOT moment. What greets them is a now-familiar beat leading into the opening lyrics of "Keep The Beat Up" by Five as out walks Tanya Black, a series of fireworks flanking her as she dances on stage to the beat, wearing not her in ring gear but an all-encompassing red robe. Walking to the ring as the song kicks into gear Tanya is all smiles as she enters the ring. Tossing the robe off as the music ends causing a massive amounts of confetti to fall not just on her and the ring but everywhere. The ringside area and all the fans even as far up as the nosebleed section. Standing there with her arms held out and her head back, Tanya looks to the heavens as the multi-colored paper blizzard covers the arena, her Title belt shining around her waist and complementing her beautiful black evening gown and expensive jewelry.
Eryk: I think this may be a first for SHOOT Project! A true blue avalanche of confetti!
OG: It’s in my hair! I’ll be brushing it off all night!
Tanya: It was only a short time ago that I arrived here in SHOOT Project. I promised the fans I would bring something to SHOOT that was missing: A sense of fun and enjoyment. This company is full of incredible athletes, the best wrestlers on the planet no doubt. That is why I am here. That is what I get out of SHOOT. To push myself and my skills to the next level every time I step into the ring. But SHOOT needs something from me as well. That is FUN. People here are great wrestlers but they are all so serious. So… dare I say it. Dreary! Always fighting each other and doing such bloody attacks. I don’t know about the rest of this roster but I got into wrestling, I stay in wrestling because I love it. I enjoy being in front of the fans and feeling their energy. Feeling their love and apprecation. Hell even their hate. But speaking of pure joy.
Tanya signals someone and with that hundreds of ballons fall from the ceiling on top of the fans causing many to begin bouncing them around and laughing. Tanya just grins and kicks up some confetti as she shines up her belt.
Eryk: What a trip. This girl really is a bit crazy as they say.
OG: What’s next? A cake? Maybe we can call down a magician to make balloon animals.
Eryk: Don’t be a hater.
Tanya: That’s what I’m talking about! See I came into this company with the best of intentions. To simply be the best I could be and to help everyone smile a little more. Abby the Interviewer likes me! Jacob the Gunslinger likes me! Though I think Stan the Old Man is still stuck in 1965. I will deal with him another night though. I know Jason Johnson is happy with me! I mean he let me do all this! And Jester Smiles… well I like him even if he doesn’t like me. Because he made this happen.
With that Tanya takes the belt off and holds it high above her head causing a huge pop from the fans that Tanya lets hang in the air for a long time before she puts the belt down and on to her shoulder.
Tanya: Jester don’t get me wrong. I really do like you for giving me an opportunity. I like that you didn’t hold back and beat the holy piss out of me. I mean I swear you hit every inch of my body with those stiff shots. Even my tits ached the next morning. But I WON. I sucked it up and took my opportunity to kick your skull inside out and now I am the NEW SIN CITY CHAMPION! I am YOUR Sin City Champion. I could not have done this alone. I am no more than what you fans make me. This is OUR title. I merely humbly represent you.
But alas the nights of standing out here with you lovely people and dressing like I’m on the red carpet will fade away soon. It will end at Salvation. Because I already told the front office two things: One. In order to make it clear that pin wasn’t a fluke Jester Smiles and I are going to go at it again for this lovely title. Two, I made a request. Not a demand like Jester does. A simple suggestion. So there is no more debate about who is the better wrestler. No accussations of fluke pins or lucky three counts. Because One pin is Lucky, two is DOMINANCE! If the front office approves at Salvation it will be a Two out of Three Falls Match For The Sin City Championship!
With that there is an even bigger pop as Tanya laughs and climbs the turnbuckles in turn holding the belt up high above her.
Eryk: I hope that match is approved. Imagine what will happen when both competitors have to go that extra mile to score that extra victory. Tanya will have to prove she can truly put Jester Smiles down. What a fighting champion!
OG: She could be fighting tonight. And if she thinks she is all though and dominant she should wake up. Jester will break her in half this time. The party ends at Salvation.
Tanya: Danke Deutschland. Ich liebe dich!
With that Tanya Black leaves the ring waving and blowing kisses to the fans as she heads up the ramp so that the show can continue on.
-We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to go live….to some pre-recorded comments by the SHOOT Project’s newest acquisition, Lunatikk Crippler. We see him standing in front of the SHOOT banner, smiling, striking a Superman pose. You know, where he’s got his hands on his hips, his chest is puffed out, and he’s staring into space at god knows what? That. He then acts like he just noticed the camera (since he paid for this time) and relaxes.-
Lunatikk Crippler: Hello there, SHOOT Project faithful! My name is Lunatikk Crippler. You may remember me from such nicknames as "The Whole Fucked Up Show", "The Innovator Of Insanity" and "Big Nuts McGee". Well, I’m here to let you all know that I have arrived here in the SHOOT Project, and I have three goals in mind.
One: Give you, the fans, my adoring public, the ride of your lives. It is my job as a professional wrestler to entertain you. Mainly, by beating the shit out of every Tom, Dick, and Jester Smiles that gets put in front of me. Hey, I would Bitchify people for free, but it’s so much better when I get paid to do it.
Dos: I will, I said that I WILL, become SHOOT Project World Champion. What is the point of claiming to be this and that without a nice, shiny, golden belt to hold up my trousers? It doesn’t matter if it’s Ben Jackman or Cade Sydal or whoever, I am officially putting everyone on notice: I will reach the promised land, and I will be top dog in this here kennel.
D: Have fun! I’ve gotten where I’m at by doing a lot of crazy things: wrestling in everything from broken glass to barbed wire, buring coals to exploding cages. My scars each tell a very interesting, very bloody story, which usually ends with me seeing boobies at the end of the night. But the blood? The guts? The pain, the carnage, the gore, the screams of terror and pain, the splatter it makes when I break someone’s face and the blood just starts gushing and pooling and spraying and dripping….-The Crippler puts his hand on his chest and looks away from the camera, obviously needing to take a moment after getting so worked up. He takes a deep breath, looks back at the camera, and continues.-Sorry. But the point I was trying to make there is that is MY idea of fun. Oh, and making fart jokes is cool too.
Now that I have laid out my goals, let’s take a close look at some of the people that will be in my way.
Like, for instance, Cade Sydal.
-The camera cuts to a photo of Justin Beiber.-
Ah, look at the little tyke! He wants to move away from the kid’s table and eat with the big boys, bless his heart. He’s gotten his chance, being the current World title holder, so maybe, just maybe, he’ll be the guy I’m standing across from when I’m good and ready to take it.
Next, we have Alex Brooks.
-Beiber disappears, and is replaced with Opie, from Andy Griffith.-
Hey, not bad kid, winning the Rule of Surrender championship like that. Kudos. Still, I don’t think you’re technically old enough to be competing here. I mean, what’s going to happen when we get back to Vegas? Is SHOOT going to get busted for breaking child labor laws?
Moving along, we come to my old friend, X-Calibur, and his new life partner, Azreal Goeren.
-We cut to a side by side of Ron Jeremy and Hitler.-
Come on, that was too easy. Don’t we have photos of any other Germans on file?
-The picture of Hitler switches to that of Colonel Klink.-
-Klink turns into an animation of Eric Cartman doing the German Dance for you.-
Not gay enough.
-Cartman switches to Chris Kattan dressed up as Gay Hitler.-
-Kattan turns into Ivan Drago from Rocky IV.-
The hell? Isn’t he Russian? Fuck it, it’s close enough. Eryk, I hear and your new friend are trying to take over the world? Hey, I guess if Pinky and the Brain can do it, you fellas have a shot, huh? Well, whatever gets your goose a-steppin’. Just be sure to warn your friend that I am not a man he wants to mess with, and we should do just fine.
Who else do we have? Ron Barker?
-The camera switches to a photo of Steve Buscemi.-
-Buscemi turns into a glass of milk.-
-The glass of milk is no a picture of E. Honda of Street Fighter.-
Fuck Zangief. What about Donovan King?
-E. Honda is replaced by Mr. T, in full Inspector Collect gear.-
Well, I know who to go to when I need to make a collect call, fool. Rocky Stellar?
-Very quickly, Mr. T turns into The Cryptkeeper.-
The fuck is that shit?! Damn, Rock, you may want to think about Botox. Wait, that isn’t even the picture I selected for Stellar, I chose Abe Vigoda. What do you have for me?
-The picture now, is of a horse’s ass.-
Oh, that’s cute. Real fucking clever. Hey, enough of the god damn photos.
-The camera cuts back to Lunatikk Crippler in front of the SHOOT Project banner, and he’s no longer smiling.-
Fun and games are all well and good, but sometimes….sometimes it’s time to stop all the bullshit and get serious. Like how I seriously want to show the lot of you what being fed though a tube is like. It doesn’t matter who it is that gets put in my path, when you are up against me, you will end up depandant on painkillers. Go ahead, come and try to prove me wrong. I’ll show you that
It’s a pain…..to be insane.
Trust me. I’m a doctor.
-The Crippler takes a swig of Dr. Pepper as we return to your regularly scheduled programming.-
“Station” by Russian Circles erupts from the sound system, and the camera takes in a wide, sweeping shot of the sold out arena. The fans come to their feet in unison, with a blast of cheers loud enough to shake the building’s foundation. It looks as if every single fan is standing, and the cheering is so loud that it is almost drowning out the music.
Jonas Coleman steps into the aisle. He starts to stride toward the ring, but he actually stops for a moment. You can see that he is a bit surprised by the volume of the reception he is getting from the capacity crowd. A slight smile of satisfaction comes over his face, and he holds one arm in the air as he resumes his march toward the squared circle.
Samantha Coil: This next contest is a NO DISQUALIFICATION match! Introducing first, making his way to the ring by way of Houston, Texas and weighing in at 222 pounds, this is JONAS COLEMAN!
As Jonas Coleman slides into the ring, the camera shot goes to the upper deck of the arena, where we see a long line of fans standing, each one holding a sign above their heads with a single letter. When read in a row, the long line reads out: COLEMAN RULES. We can see other fans holding up signs reading “Come and Fucking Get it” and a few with the phrase “Jonas Coleman: Defender of the Faith.” There is also a large number of fans wearing Jonas Coleman t-shirts in the crowd.
The shot goes back to Jonas Coleman, who is nodding in appreciation to the fans that are giving him one of the louder ovations in recent SHOOT Project history. We also notice that in addition to black wrestling boots, black knee pads, black wrist tape and black wrestling tights, Jonas Coleman has both of his hands heavily wrapped in black tape. The camera zooms in and we can see that the left hand of Jonas Coleman is so heavily taped that it almost looks like a cast.
The music slowly dies, and is replaced with the vicious guitar riff starting “Brotherhood of Man” by Motörhead. As loud as the cheers for Jonas Coleman sounded the jeers and boos are now equally as loud. Dave Dymond emerges into the spotlight at the top of the ramp, dressed in his usual outfit of jogging shoes, jeans, and a purple OPW t-shirt and baseball cap, topped off by a jet black suit coat. Behind him, we see the menacing form of Akuma Satsui. Satsui is decked out in his usual dark blue Karate pants with a blood red sash around his waist. He has a red towel over his head, and all we can see is that he has a sharpened wooden stick in between his teeth.
Samantha Coil: His opponent is being led to the ring by his manager, the man who wishes to be known as THE 2011 SHOOT PROJECT MANAGER OF THE YEAR – DAVE DYMOND! Hailing from Japan, and weighing in at 350 pounds, this is THE ASIAN NIGHTMARE: AKUMA SATSUI!
Dave Dymond leads Akuma Satsui to the ring, and the camera is directly in front of him. Dymond is pointing into the camera, talking a mile a minute, even though we can’t hear him due to the music. Akuma Satsui rips the towel from his head and hands it to Dymond, who stays at the ringside area. Satsui enters the ring, points across the ring at Coleman, and hisses.
Austin Liman is standing in the corner, looking very nervous. Samantha Coil leaves the ring, the lights go down all over the arena, leaving only the spotlight above the ring illuminating the arena, and Mark Kendrick rings the bell to get the match underway…
Eryk Masters: The feud between these two men continues to gain momentum every week, and as it does Jonas Coleman is rapidly becoming the most popular man in SHOOT Project, OG.
The Other Guy: As popular as Coleman is getting, Dymond and Satsui are becoming equally hated. We’ve seen plenty of unpopular men over the years, but Dymond and Satsui are so despised by the fans right now, it’s crazy. These people just HATE them. You always have the so-called “bad guys” who some fans think it’s cool to cheer, but I don’t think anybody likes these two.
Eryk Masters: You have to attribute that to the tactics of Dave Dymond. He does things that I can’t see anybody cheering. This past week was a perfect example of that.
The Other Guy: There are certain lines you just don’t cross. You don’t mess with a man’s family. You certainly don’t drag innocent people – like little kids – into your issues, but Dave Dymond seems to think that there is nothing off limits in his quest to put Jonas Coleman out of SHOOT, permanently.
The bell has rung to start the match but surprisingly, Jonas Coleman does not charge straight at Satsui, and Akuma Satsui does not charge at Coleman. The two men slowly circle each other, both looking each other directly in the eyes. There is a definite look of hatred in the eyes of both men, but they are also being very careful, neither one wanting to make a mistake.
Outside the ring, Dave Dymond is pacing back and forth, shouting encouragement at Akuma Satsui, shouting insults at Jonas Coleman, shouting at the fans to shut up, and just basically being loud and obnoxious.
Finally, Satsui and Coleman lock up in a hand over arm hold, and they jostle for position. After a brief struggle, Satsui powers Coleman back to the mat. Jonas Coleman lands flat on his back, and Akuma Satsui takes aim, and drops to the mat with an elbow smash, intended for the torso of Jonas Coleman – but Coleman rolls out of the way! Akuma Satsui lands elbow first on the mat, and before he can get his bearings, Jonas Coleman grabs one of his legs, and applies a standing leglock, and starts twisting.
Akuma Satsui shouts out in pain and surprise, and he starts swinging from his back, up toward Coleman, but he cannot connect. Finally, after giving Satsui’s leg one final violent wrenching twist, Coleman snaps his opponent’s leg down toward the mat. Coleman leaps into the air and drives a knee downward, attempting to connect on the leg of Akuma Satsui with a kneedrop. This time, it’s Akuma Satsui who rolls out of the way, and Jonas Coleman hits the mat knee first.
Eryk Masters: I wasn’t expecting any wrestling in this match, I was expecting a repeat of what we saw last time, lots of brawling and violence. Especially since this match is No Disqualification.
The Other Guy: The thing is that now these guys know each other a lot better. Coleman knows that he can bash Satsui over the head with a steel chain, and Satsui will get up and blow a fireball in his face. Satsui knows he can go as far as smashing Coleman’s hand with a chair, and Coleman will come back. The whole idea of trying to top each other with violence might not work, so maybe they are going to try to beat each other with a wrestling hold now?
Akuma Satsui stands up, rubbing his leg painfully. Jonas Coleman starts to stand up, and Satsui reaches over, pulls Coleman toward him, and then drives an elbow smash right into the back of the skull of Jonas Coleman! Coleman stumbles forward, obviously stunned and knocked off balance.
Satsui stays on the attack, and pulls Jonas Coleman toward him, and spins him around. Akuma Satsui fires a vicious looking knife-edge chop across the torso of Jonas Coleman. The sickening smack sound of Satsui’s arm slapping across the chest of Coleman literally echoes throughout the sold out arena.
Jonas Coleman steadies himself, and with a look of determination on his face, he starts to fire a series of European uppercuts at Akuma Satsui, with his right forearm and fist. Akuma Satsui is caught by surprise and stumbles back into the ropes. Coleman moves in to fire another uppercut, but Satsui sees it coming and jabs his thumb right into the Adam’s apple of Jonas Coleman! Coleman is stopped dead in his tracks and starts to sputter, gasp and cough.
Eryk Masters: Things are starting to heat up now, OG.
The Other Guy: Didn’t take long, did it? Chops and punches are starting to fly, and I am betting since there are no disqualifications, it won’t be long until weapons start to show up in this match.
Akuma Satsui is still backed up against the ropes, but he takes the chance to grab Coleman around the wrist and throws him across the ring into the ropes. Satsui rebounds of the ropes, heading back toward Akuma Satsui at full speed.
Akuma Satsui bends over and delivers a high back body drop to Jonas Coleman – but since Satsui was right against the ropes, Coleman flies high into the air, and sails right over the top rope to the outside! Jonas Coleman lands on the floor outside the ring in a painful looking heap, as the German fans erupt!
The announcers show a replay of Jonas Coleman being tossed high in the air, over the top rope to the outside, as the fans continue to chant. Jonas Coleman is rolling around on the floor, holding his back. It is only a matter of seconds before Dave Dymond sprints around the ring from where he was standing, to where Jonas Coleman landed. With a huge grin on his face, Dave Dymond starts laying the boots to Jonas Coleman. Dymond is gleefully stomping on Jonas Coleman, as Akuma Satsui looks on from inside the ring.
Eryk Masters: Here’s something else that didn’t take long – Dave Dymond getting physically involved in this match. It’s been what, not even 10 minutes and here he is, sticking his nose in.
The Other Guy: Dave Dymond looks like a kid in a candy store, he has Jonas Coleman down, in a compromising position, and he is taking full advantage.
Suddenly, Jonas Coleman shakes his head, shouts out in pure rage, and stands straight up! Dave Dymond’s jaw drops in shock, and he stumbles backward, looking terrified. Dymond holds both hands up and screams at the top of his lungs…
“NO WAIT! DON’T HURT ME! I HAVE CARPAL TUNNEL SYNDROME!”
Jonas Coleman charges forward, grabs Dave Dymond around the neck, and literally hurls him over the crowd barrier, into the crowd! Chairs and fans scatter everywhere, and Jonas Coleman leaps over the barrier and goes after Dymond. Before Dave Dymond can even stand up, Coleman gets to him and starts to stomp on the back of the shell-shocked manager.
The fans are going insane, as Coleman stomps away on Dymond, who is on all fours and is trying unsuccessfully to crawl away. The camera man is fixed in on their position, and for the fans who can’t see them at ringside, the action is being shown on the video screens all over the sold out arena.
Akuma Satsui has now slid out of the ring, rolled over the crowd barrier, and he is charging through the crowd, screeching at the top of his lungs. The fans, who had been gathered around Jonas Coleman, slapping him on the back and encouraging him, see Satsui barreling towards Coleman with murder in his eyes, and they leap out of the way.
Eryk Masters: As expected, this match has spiraled out of control already, and now Coleman is in the sixth row, stomping the life out of Dave Dymond.
The Other Guy: Here comes Satsui though, look out!
Akuma Satsui charges and tackles Jonas Coleman at full speed, taking him down to the concrete, sending even more chairs and fans flying. Satsui grabs Jonas Coleman by the hair and starts to bash his head on the concrete, and then he slowly gets back to his feet, and pulls Coleman back up to his.
Satsui measures Coleman off, and fires off another one of his blistering knife-edge chops to the torso of his opponent. The smacking noise upon impact is sickening, and Jonas Coleman stumbles backward a couple of steps, before steadying himself, and putting all his weight into a perfectly executed European Uppercut, which sends Satsui’s jaw and face snapping backward from the impact of Coleman’s fist and forearm connecting with a swinging upward motion.
Satsui shakes his head, trying to clear his thoughts, and then fires another knife-edge chop which connects. The slicing slap is stingingly accurate, and it sends Jonas Coleman back, holding his chest in pain, but once again he comes back, throwing all of his weight and effort into a perfectly placed upward European Uppercut. It connects right on target, and Akuma Satsui is rocked, stumbling back a few feet.
Eryk Masters: Look at Dave Dymond, he’s crawling away like a scared dog.
The Other Guy: Hey, I like dogs. Don’t insult them by comparing them to Dymond. But check out Satsui and Coleman! Satsui keeps nailing Coleman with those wicked chops, but Coleman keeps coming back with those upward swinging punches. These guys are taking turns chopping and clobbering each other, back and forth!
Indeed, the two men are almost into a rhythm now – every time Akuma Satsui lands another stinging chop across the chest of Jonas Coleman, Coleman stumbles back from the impact, but then inevitably comes back with a massive uppercut, which is catching Satsui right in the jaw, sending him staggering just as badly. The two men are literally brawling their way through the crowd, not paying any serious attention to where they are going.
Dave Dymond is finally back up to his feet. He is also looking the worse for wear, as he has been roughed up pretty badly. Despite that, he is now circling the two brawling men in the crowd, shouting encouragement at Akuma Satsui, and alternating that with screams of profane insults toward Jonas Coleman. The two men are now so far out into the crowd that the cameraman has switched to a remote unit, and is following them at a safe distance. The fans in the cheap seats seem happy, since they are getting an up close view of Akuma Satsui and Jonas Coleman brawling right among them.
Back in the ring, Austin Linam is actually standing on the second turnbuckle, peering out into the crowd. The two men have now brawled their way so far out of sight that he can barely see them. He looks over toward Mark Kendrick and Samantha Coil, and shouts something. A discussion seems to be going on between the referee, ring announcer, and time keeper.
Eryk Masters: The fans here in Germany are getting their money’s worth in one sense, because Akuma Satsui and Jonas Coleman are beating the hell out of each other. Every time one lands a good shot, the other one fires right back! The only problem is, they are pretty damn far from the ring!
The Other Guy: Yeah, and I don’t know what Austin Linam is planning on doing about that. He sure isn’t dumb enough to go all the way out there, and get in between these guys, and trying to send them back here. He saw what happened to the last referee that tried to officiate a Coleman vs. Satsui match!
The two men have now brawled all the way to the far side of the arena, and they have reached an access tunnel that seems to lead out of the actual arena itself, into other parts of the building. Akuma Satsui sees a huge steel garbage can at the head of the tunnel, and he grabs it, and holds it over his head. Satsui has a crazy look on his face as he swings the trash can down and bashes it over the head of Jonas Coleman.
Jonas Coleman lands on tailbone, and is holding his head in pain. However, he has the presence of mind to roll to the side, and grab a steel chair, folding it up. Akuma Satsui swings with the steel trash bin again, but this time Coleman is ready, and swings the chair in defense. The chair hits the trash can, knocking it out of Satsui’s hands and sending garbage flying everywhere.
Jonas Coleman keeps the steel chair folded up, and rams it into the midsection of Akuma Satsui, doubling him over. Coleman throws the chair aside, and nails Akuma Satsui in the jaw with a wicked kneelift! Satsui staggers backward, and falls through the curtain at the end of the access tunnel, out of sight! Dave Dymond points at Jonas Coleman and screams at the top of his lungs…
Dymond sprints through the curtain, out of sight. Jonas Coleman is drenched in sweat, but he leans down, picks up the folded up steel chair and goes through the curtain, like a hunter after his wounded prey.
The bell rings.
Samantha Coil: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN…DUE TO BOTH WRESTLERS LEAVING THE RING AREA AND FAILING TO RETURN IN A REASONABLE AMOUNT OF TIME, REFEREE AUSTIN LINAM HAS NO CHOICE BUT TO DECLARE THIS MATCH A DOUBLE COUNTOUT!
There is a deafening chorus of boos from all over, and the referee shrugs and shakes his head as he makes his way up the aisle. We are taken to Eryk Masters and The Other Guy in the broadcast position.
Eryk Masters: A disappointing end to this match, OG. But you can’t really blame him, I don’t think those two were going to come back to the ring any time soon. This feud isn’t about winning a wrestling match anymore. It’s about a lot more than that.
The Other Guy: I agree, but how the hell are these guys going to settle this issue between them? They have fought to a double disqualification. They’ve now fought to a double countout. They’ve broken bones, thrown fireballs – this isn’t going to end until SHOOT can figure out a way to contain them and let them fight it out.
The camera cuts to the inside of Project: Scar’s locker room where all three of its members: Isaac Entragian, Kenji Yamada, and Adrian Corazon are sitting across from one another.
Isaac Entragian: Gotta admit, the cow liver? That was some fucked up shit. Now THAT is how you send a fucking message…
Adrian Corazon: Thank you, thank you. I try. Kenji & I are already in Mike’s head, and YOU…ole, pale, tall and evil, you’ve already made SCAR proud. What you did to Lennox was….breathtaking…
Before Isaac can respond, a knock comes at the door.
Corazon and Yamada look to Entragian who smirks slightly as he stands up and walks methodically to the door. He lays a hand on the doorknob and presses his head up to the metal door.
Isaac Entragian: Little pig, little pig… let me in.
Isaac’s voice is unnaturally high pitched, but then it drops several octaves into a deep baritone.
Isaac Entragian: Not by the hairs on my chinny… chin… chin…
There’s a pause as Kenji and Adrian try not to laugh.
Voice: Are you finished?
Issac’s face sours.
Isaac Entragian: Nah, but you are. Fuck off…unless you want your guts to hit the floor of that hallway when I open this door.
Voice: Oh, well then… I guess I just won’t tell you this important information about Lennox Ferguson the-
Before the voice can finish, Isaac swings the door open to find Ichiro Seppuku standing there in a finely tailored business suit and purple tie.
Ichiro Seppuku: Oh good. You do care.
Isaac’s face is a mix of eagerness and annoyance.
Isaac Entragian: What about the Ox?
Ichiro looks up to Isaac, showing no signs of intimidation or fear – but instead, seemingly to relish the power of information he holds over the Ivory Terror.
Ichiro Seppuku: Yesterday, Lennox Ferguson got on a plane bound for New York City… he won’t be making his match at Dominion.
You can hear the boos from the audience all the way in the back as Ichiro speaks these words. Entragian similarly looks vexed and angry… but then he smiles.
Isaac Entragian: Well Ichi, that’s a damn shame. Have you been chirping in his ear like a parakeet, telling him what’s best for him, telling him what he should and should not do? Don’t even answer that. Just tell me why you’re here…are you his little messenger boy now?
Ichiro smiles in return.
Ichiro Seppuku: I wanted to offer my services… as his replacement.
Ichiro dips his head to the side and drops his smile as he locks eyes with Kenji Yamada, who immediately stands up and takes a defensive posture.
Seppuku keeps his eyes on Kenji as he continues…
Ichiro Seppuku: Just thought I should let you know.
Ichiro steps back and refocuses his attention on Entragian.
Ichiro Seppuku: Now if you excuse me… I have some business to attend to with the boss.
See you around my chromatically challenged friend.
The monster cracks his head to the side, sizing up the infamous Ichiro Seppuku, thinking to himself that he’d love to take a chunk out of one of this man’s internal organs and spit it right back into his fucking smug face.
Isaac Entragian: It’s your funeral…
Entragian bares his unnaturally sharpened teeth at Ichiro who just nods and, putting his hands behind his back, walks away from the locker room.
The camera sidesteps Entragian to see Kenji Yamada’s concerned expression turned into a widening grin as Adrian Corazon is whispering something in his ear.
The scene opens up on a neatly wrapped gift sitting on a bench in the locker room. The camera zooms back to see none other than the SHOOT Project World Tag Team Champions The Bad Ass Brotherhood standing around the box. Buck Dresden and Charles Brandon Magnus are staring at the box, both men deep in thought over what it might contain.
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: Gwyneth Paltrow’s head.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: A pecan pie.
Magnus looks at Buck.
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: In Germany?
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: You thought Gwyneth Paltrow’s head would be in Germany.
Magnus nods, understanding the odd logic.
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: Well, obviously it’s not something like a prom night dumpster baby or it would have made noise by now.
Dresden sits down next to the box and pulls the bow off. He opens the top slowly, leaning his head back away from the possible anthrax attack. He reaches in and pulls out a stack of photos.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: It’s from Valjean an’ Skylar.
Magnus snatches the pictures away.
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: This one is of Valjean holding your belt and standing in front of a…Kolsch brewery?
Dresden gets up and looks over Magnus’s shoulder.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: Is that your belt in this one?
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: What the hell is Skylar doing in front of…is that the throne of Charlemagne?
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: Yep.
Magnus looks at Dresden.
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: You have no idea who Charlemagne is.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: He’s responsible for the Frank Empire’s advancement in Europe and is known at the father of modern Europe.
Magnus stares at Dresden for a long, awkward moment.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: And it looks like Jay Skylar’s gettin’ a hand jay from some German girl with your belt as the censor bar.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: It’s awright, man. When this is all over, we’ll buy you a big can of Lysol!
Magnus clenches his teeth as Dresden slaps him on the shoulder.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: Makes you feel any better, Valjean took my belt all the way to France!
Dresden slides the next picture out to show Ray Valjean standing in front of the Eiffel Tower. Magnus sighs and pulls the note that comes at the end of the photos, dropping the rest to the floor.
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: Dearest dickheads.
Magnus clears his throat.
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: We hope you enjoyed your pictorial tour of Germany with your favorite Tag Team Champions…VAS. As you can see, we went to the best places in all of Germany and really gave SHOOT some good PR as the Tag Champions. We went everywhere. The place where Charles Brandon Magnus’s great granddad Charlemagne took dumps, where Germany’s beer is brewed, where Hitler lived out his S&M fantasies, and we even got to visit Germany’s famous Eiffel Tower.
Magnus looks at Dresden, confused.
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: We’re sorry we couldn’t make it to Revolution, boys, but here’s a bunch of photos of us being awesome. Try not to get too much man goo on them, as we’ll want them back for our EuroVAS Tour Scrapbook. Your Champions…VAS.
Magnus throws the paper down, angry.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: …the Eiffel Tower ain’t in Germany, right?
Magnus turns again to his partner.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: …it…IS French, right?
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: You can’t be serious.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: Yeah…no. No, I was just kiddin’, man!
CHARLES BRANDON MAGNUS: I’m getting tired of these games! If those two brats think they’re gonna take what WE earned and prance all over Europe with them and get nothing back from us for it, they’ve got another thing coming. At Salvation, those sorry excuses for human beings get what’s really coming to them. I hope to God above they show up at Dominion, Buck. GOD, I hope they show up at Dominion!
Magnus storms out of the locker room, incensed. Dresden waits for Magnus to leave completely and reaches into his back pocket, pulling out a pocket sized “Tourist’s Guide to Germany” booklet. He opens it up and scans the table of contents. Buck purses his lips and flips to the end, reading through the index.
‘BIG’ BUCKLEY DRESDEN: Hm. Well, if it ain’t in this here book, I guess it IS in France.
Buck nods as the camera fades to black.
A camera cuts to the back onto a close up of the SHOOT Project World Heavyweight Champions Locker room door, laughing and talking can be heard through the door, as the outside knob slowly turns and the door swings open from the inside. In a flash, Ben Jackman’s right arm pistons through the doorway dragging Cade Sydal out into the hall and in one fluid motion up against the wall with a heavy thud. Jackman’s face mere inches from Cade’s surprise widened eyes, a broad smile cracks across his face, his hand tightening around Cade’s neck.
Ben Jackman: Hello, Cade.
At that moment, Cassi walks out of the locker room, a strangled gasp escaping her lips before she can manage to get a hand over her mouth in a vain attempt to stop the sound from escaping. Jackman turns toward the sound, the smile on his face only growning at the sight of Cassi Ryan.
Ben Jackman: Cassi, I just need to have a quick chat with Cade, if that’s alright with you. Why don’t you have a seat?
Jackman nodded over his shoulder at the folding chair still sitting against the wall, before turning his full attention back to Cade.
Now, Cade, this won’t take long. I’m sure you’ve got some very important self-aggrandizing to get to and I wouldn’t want to keep you from it.
Cade struggled against Jackman’s grip.
Cade Sydal: Be…
Jackman slammed his left hand into the wall a hair away from the side of Cade’s face.
Ben Jackman: Shut the fuck up! It’s good for you.
Jackman pulled his fist away from the wall, the broad smile fading from his face.
Ben Jackman: I’m here to apologize, Cade. I should’ve let you have your moment a few weeks ago, should’ve let you soak it all in but I didn’t, and for that I apologize.
Cassi Ryan: That’s more like it.
Jackman turned his head slowly toward Cassi, the fire in his eyes silencing her immediately.
Ben Jackman: The less you yap, the faster this conversation ends. Now shut it.
Jackman turned his attention back to Cade, his grip tightening.
Ben Jackman: But then Cade you came out and pissed on my tiny little moment, you busted me open before I could even make it to the ring. You’ve got my blood on your hands, Cade, and that could be a problem. But I’m wiling to let it go. I overstepped my bounds, I’ll admit. You retaliated, and as far as I’m concerned we can leave it there. Once this conversation ends and I walk away, you keep your hands to yourself and we’ll just forget any of that ever happened. No one will ever know about this little meeting, and you can go on being SHOOT Project World Heavyweight Champion. Or….
Jackman leaned in closer to Cade, there noises almost touching, the smile on Jackman’s face spreading even wider.
Ben Jackman: Well lets not get into negativity, Cade, what do you say, do we have a deal?
Jackman loosened his grip on Cade’s neck and backed up a step.
Cade Sydal: Go fuck yourself!
Jackman’s left fist swung up in a blur before crashing into Cade’s right eye with a hollow thud, his right hand pinning him back up against the wall.
Ben Jackman: That’s what I thought you’d say. Let me remind you that you have nothing to gain from going to war with me Cade. Nothing. If you push this any further and we end up across from each other in the ring, there is no positive ending for you. If you kick my ass, if you end my career, guess what? You just beat a has-been that never really ever was after a seven year layoff. But Cade, Cade is if I stomp your ass from one end of the ring to the other, you just got your ass kicked by that same washed up old man. You can’t win this Cade. You have nothing to gain.
Jackman let go of Cade completely, and took a few steps backward.
Ben Jackman: I’m not here for your gold, Cade, but if you can’t forget all this I’ll take it.
Jackman backed up another step or two, the smile completely gone now.
Ben Jackman: I’m gonna walk away now, Champ. Don’t do anything, stupid.
Jackman turned and walked back up the hallway, leaving Cade and Cassi staring as the cameras fade out.
The packed 02 World Hamburg arena is buzzing with anticipation as Samantha Coil stands in the center of the ring with a microphone in hand.
Samantha Coil: THE FOLLOWING IS A SINGLES MATCH AND IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!
Other Guy: You feel it, Eryk?
Eryk Masters: Oh God, do we have to do this?
Other Guy: Get your camera ready, its time for the homecoming party!
Yo yo yo yo yo fuck you!
"I’ll Bee Dat!" by Redman hits over the arena’s loudspeakers as the crowd breaks out into a mass eruption of boos, every single fan already on their feet and jeering.
Yo zim zeema who got the keys to my Beema?
Jack move that’s how we act when we team up
Samantha Coil: INTRODUCING FIRST…FROM PLAINFIELD, NEW JERSEY AND WEIGHING IN AT 260 POUNDS…RAAAAAANDE’ JOHNSON!!!
Rande steps out from behind the curtain and is greeted by a seething audience. He’s dressed in his normal wrestling gear with no hint of his Pestalance persona at all. Rande shakes his head as he makes his way down to the ramp, the fans screaming obscenities at him as he walks by.
Eryk Masters: Definitely a hostile crowd to say the least.
Other Guy: Whoa, what the…? No Firestarter? No face paint?
Eryk Masters: One of the hottest topics of conversation with our SHOOT faithful over the last few weeks has been the obvious change we’ve seen in Rande. It appears as if he’s trying to keep his Pestalance alter-ego in check as of late.
Other Guy: Stupid idea if you ask me. Burn this mutha fucka down, pookie!
Throw your triple beam up, this is fish scale
I bailed out the county with counterfeit bills
Rande steps through the ropes and stares down referee Willie Dean, the fans letting loose with a barrage of boos that literally vibrate throughout the arena.
My slang be high range Brick City
Watch how you sniff son I’m highly octane
All you hear is BANG, BANG, BANG, BANG
He shakes his head again, turning towards the ramp as his music dies down. The silence immediately causes the fans to stop booing and almost immediately switch over to a MASSIVE raucous cheer as they await his opponent.
Eryk Masters: You gotta be kidding me…
Other Guy: Only in Germany baby! And he hasn’t even been introdu…
The opening guitar riff of "Sieben" by Subway to Sally hits as the 02 World Hamburg arena becomes absolutely unglued, forcing Samantha Coil to actually scream the rest of the introductions into the microphone in order to have her voice heard over the insane amount of cheers.
Samantha Coil: AND HIS OPPONENT…FROM EBERSWALDE, GERMANY…PLEASE WELCOME HOME, THE MEGASTAR! AAAAAAAAAAAZRAEL GOEREN!
A huge gold and red pyro explosion goes off at the top of the stage as Azrael slowly steps out from the back. He stops at the top of the ramp and stares out at the arena packed with his countrymen, looking like he’s a little shocked himself at just how crazy this reaction is.
Eryk Masters: THIS PLACE HAS OFFICIALLY GONE APE SHIT!
Other Guy: WHAT!? TALK LOUDER! FUCK, IF THIS KEEPS UP THIS WILL BE THE FIRST WRESTLING MATCH EVER CALLED COMPLETELY IN SIGN LANGUAGE!
Azrael makes his way down the ramp, slapping hands with every single fan he can before he rolls under the bottom rope and ascends to the top turnbuckle, holding his arms out to his side as the fans continue their cheers.
Eryk Masters: This is amazing, I don’t think I’ve ever heard this arrogant bastard get anything more than a golf clap before!
Other Guy: I’ve always cheered him.
Eryk Masters: That’s because he pays you every time you say his name on air.
Other Guy: Now you can’t prove that. (whispers) Azrael Goeren.
Azrael hops down from the turnbuckle, only to find himself face-to-face with Rande in the middle of the ring. Rande starts talking to Azrael, looking like he’s trying to explain himself to his fellow Sovereign member.
Eryk Masters: Rande has been through a lot lately, I think I just overheard him say "This is Pestalance’s fault".
Other Guy: I think these two are trying to talk out their differences, good for them! Sovereign hug!
Rande continues trying to reason with Azrael before Willie Dean calls for the bell. Almost immediately, Azrael leans back and connects with a vicious forearm across Rande’s face, staggering him into the ropes.
Other Guy: Or not.
Azrael grabs hold of Rande’s wrist and throws him into the opposite ropes, diving to the mat as Rande leaps over him. Goeren is back on his feet and connects with a low dropkick to Rande’s knees, causing him to crash face first to the mat.
Eryk Masters: Looks like Azrael is going right for Rande’s knee.
Other Guy: Smart move. These two guys have done this tango before, they know each other’s weaknesses.
Goeren drops his knee directly onto the back of Rande’s leg, causing him to grimace in pain. Goeren continues to grind his knee down, pulling Rande’s leg back in awkward position as the fans roar in approval.
Eryk Masters: Goeren going for an early submission, Willie Dean is right there!
Other Guy: Come on, no way Rande’ taps to that.
Referee Dean asks if Rande wants to submit but is quickly waved off. Rande reaches up and grabs a fistful of Azrael’s hair, yanking Azrael’s head backwards as Goeren releases the hold. He’s not letting go of Goeren as he pulls him up to his feet, tucks his head down and slams Azrael to the mat with a violent DDT!
Other Guy: The crowd did not like that one bit, Rande better arm himself when he leaves the arena tonight.
Eryk Masters: Wait…what the hell is Rande doing?
Rande stares down at Azrael and holds his hand out for Azrael to get back to his feet. Azrael stares back at Rande, completely wide-eyed at his offer of assistance…before swiftly mule kicking Rande’s knees out from under him in response.
Eryk Masters: Rande actually tried to help Goeren up and got blasted for his troubles!
Other Guy: I think he’s still trying to patch things up with him, but Azrael isn’t having any of it!
Azrael greedily rolls Rande to his back and hooks the leg, trying for a quick pin.
Rande almost throws Azrael halfway across the ring as both man scurry to their feet. Rande charges in with a diving lariat but Goeren ducks! Azrael kicks Rande hard in the midsection and takes off for the ropes, coming back with a full head of steam before he drops to his knees and connects with a rising European uppercut that slumps Rande into the corner.
Eryk Masters: Rande looks to be in some pain here, we usually don’t see him show it nearly this much.
Other Guy: He seriously needs to let Pestalance take over, and fast!
Azrael positions himself directly over Rande, grinding the sole of boot right into Rande’s face. He grabs onto the ropes for extra leverage, wildly kicking at Rande’s prone head as he grins out at the frenzied crowd. He takes a few steps back and waves out to the fans with his hands as they start a chant, similar to one you would hear before a soccer penalty kick or a kickoff to football game.
Goeren charges forward, looking to connect with a running boot to the face, but Rande catches his foot before it hits!
Eryk Masters: Now Goeren wants to talk! Look at him! He’s pleading with Rande to let go!
Rande gets to his feet, still holding onto Azrael’s leg causing him to hop around the ring on his free leg. Rande spins him around by his leg and this time connects beautifully with a charging lariat that nearly takes Goeren’s head clean off!
Other Guy: HOLY SHIT, RANDE’ JUST PERFORMED A FATALITY!
Rande goes for the cover with Referee Dean in perfect position for the count.
The fans explode with a standing ovation, trying to cheer Azrael on. Rande’ looks to be all business now as he pulls a groggy Azrael back to his feet and starts working him hard into the ropes with a series of knife edge chops.
Eryk Masters: Rande looks to be in control here, another wicked chop right across Goeren’s chest. Azrael looks dazed…Rande hooks his arms around Goeren’s chest and…
Other Guy: WHOA! RELEASE BELLY TO BELLY OVERHEAD SUPLEX!
Azrael sprawls out in the middle of the ring as Rande goes for another cover, this time hooking the leg and holding Goeren’s shoulders down with his free hand.
Azrael gets his right shoulder up at the last possible second, rolling over to his stomach to try and protect himself. Rande looks over at Referee Dean and holds up three fingers before he frustratingly gets to his feet.
Eryk Masters: Another close call for Rande. I don’t think he’s looking to patch things up with Azrael anymore, he’s going in for the kill!
Rande reaches down and yanks Azrael up once again, but Azrael quickly wraps his hands around the back of Rande’s head and sits down into a jawbreaker out of nowhere! Rande hits the mat as Azrael swoops in and gets into a mount position, raining hammerblows down on Rande’s skull!
Other Guy: ICH BIN EIN AMAZING!
Eryk Masters: Oh please…
Azrael quickly changes into a side position and bends Rande’s arm back before wrapping his other arm around his head and starts to pull up. Rande tries to fight him off with a few jabs, but Azrael locks it in tight.
Eryk Masters: ANACONDA VICE! AZRAEL’S GOT HIM DEAD TO RIGHTS!
Other Guy: Oh man, that’s fucking gross. Look at the way he’s contorting Rande’s neck!
Azrael violently leans back, looking like he’s set at breaking Rande’s neck. Rande lets out a visceral scream as Willie Dean asks him if he wants to tap.
Eryk Masters: How in the hell is he NOT tapping? You gotta give Rande credit here…
Other Guy: I’ll give him credit for being we-todd-ed. If he stays in that hold any longer, he’ll be mailed back to New Jersey!
Goeren digs his feet into the mat and pulls back one last time, spitting out for Rande to tap. An audible "Fuck Off" is picked up by the camera as the hold is suddenly broken. The fans break into a feverish cheer but Azrael doesn’t appear too happy.
Eryk Masters: DID HE QUIT?! DID RANDE TAP?!
Other Guy: The fans here sure think he did!
The referee leans down to check on Rande as Azrael paces around his opponent, his hands on his hips. Referee Dean shakes his head and sweeps his arms back and forth, signaling that no submission was given as the cheers quickly turn into boos.
Eryk Masters: NO SUBMISSION! GOEREN MUST HAVE KNOWN HE WASN’T GOING TO GET RANDE’ TO QUIT IN THE VICE!
Other Guy: Yeah but look at him now, Rande can barely lift his fucking head!
Rande is clearly in a lot of pain as he reaches for the second rope to try and steady himself. Azrael moves in but is met with a surprise elbow to his stomach. Rande gets to one knee…and NAILS Azrael with a hook right to the gut, causing the German to double over in pain.
Eryk Masters: I’m betting Goeren wishes he didn’t break that hold now!
Azrael holds onto his stomach as he tries to move forward, not wanting to lose any momentum. Rande’ blindly meets him, still favoring his neck but manages to lift Goeren up off the mat and throws him down with everything he’s got with an insane SPINEBUSTER that shakes the ring!
Eryk Masters: HOLY SHIT!
Other Guy: WHERE DID THAT COME FROM!
Eryk Masters: Rande is dragging himself over to Goeren! He’s got his leg!
Both men lay racked with pain on the mat, neither one of them moving. The crowd kicks in with another strong "AZRAEL" chant as everyone is on their feet in the arena once again. Suddenly, Rande starts to move first and gets met with another round of boos in his direction.
Eryk Masters: Rande was SO close to sending all of these fans home unhappy!
Other Guy: He’s still favoring that neck though, see how he can’t even look straight ahead?
Azrael slowly starts to move as well, both men getting to their knees as they start to exchange a volley of punches to each other’s head. Rande leans back and connects with a stiff uppercut, causing Azrael to rock backwards. Azrael moves back and responds with a rake of the eyes, digging his fingers into Rande’s eye sockets and bending his neck backwards!
Eryk Masters: COME ON! THIS ISN’T ONE OF HIS BULLSHIT "MAKE-UP-THE-RULES-AS-YOU-GO-ALONG" invitational matches, get in there ref!
Other Guy: Fuck, look at the angle Rande’s neck is in!
Azrael quickly stops before the referee can reprimand him and struggles to get to his feet. He pulls himself up with the ring ropes, looking like he’s trying to steady himself. Rande slowly stirs as well, holding his neck as he gets into a sitting position in front of Azrael…
Eryk Masters: NO!
Goeren surges forward and crashes his boot into the side of Rande’s skull with a sickening THUD, snapping his neck back violently with a buzzsaw side kick!
Other Guy: BLITZKRIEG! GOEREN NAILED IT!
Goeren dives for the cover, hooking Rande’s leg and putting all of his body weight down on his injured neck in the process.
The crowd explodes into another deafening round of cheers with German flags and Azrael Goeren signs proudly being displayed throughout the sold out arena!
Other Guy: WHOOOOOOO! PARTY IN HAMBURG TONIGHT! SAUSAGES, SAUERKRAUT AND SPATEN FOR EVERYONE!
Eryk Masters: Oh yeah, everyone here should be REAL proud of this guy. What an outstanding representative of the German people.
Azrael slowly rolls off Rande and gets to his knees, soaking in the admiration of his fellow countrymen. He smugly gets to his feet and sneers down at Rande who has yet to move after the kick. He calls over to Referee Dean who reluctantly leaves Rande’s side and holds up Azrael’s arm in victory.
Samantha Coil: HERE IS YOUR WINNER BY PINFALL…THE MEGASTAR, AAAAAAAAAAZRAEL GOEREN!
Goeren points to the ceiling as black, gold and red confetti start to pour down on the adoring fans inside the arena. He rolls underneath the bottom ring rope and makes his way to a group of fans at ringside, grabbing hold of their oversized German flag as he drapes it over his shoulders and continues to celebrate with the fans.
Eryk Masters: What a schmuck. The guy comes in here with an overwhelming home crowd advantage and the only reason he ends up winning is because of his shitty cheating tactics. He almost blinded Rande for cryin’ out loud!
Other Guy: Yeah but I can’t help but think Pestalance would have easily fought through that shit. Time to give the Firestarter back the keys if you ask me.
Eryk Masters: Great plan, lets push Rande further into a state of insanity.
Other Guy: Listen, we all know Pestalance is a monster. Nobody in SHOOT can stop the guy if he just gave in.
Eryk Masters: We’ll just have to wait and see what effect this match has on Rande in the future…
We are taken to Eryk Masters and The Other Guy at the broadcast position. Eryk Masters has one hand up against his ear, and we can tell he is being told something in his headset.
Eryk Masters: Fans, at the conclusion of the double countout between Akuma Satsui and Jonas Coleman tonight, we saw them disappear into the backstage area where the cameraman couldn’t follow them. We are now being told that the two men continued to brawl after going through the curtain – we’re not even sure they knew or cared that the match was over.
The Other Guy: So the tech geeks have set up a remote camera, and we’re being told that it isn’t over, those two are still duking it out somewhere back there! We’re going to switch to our remote camera, and try and get to them…
We switch to a shot of the backstage area, and in a long concrete hallway, we see Jonas Coleman and Akuma Satsui. Both men are dripping with sweat, and both men are now bleeding. Jonas Coleman has a long red welt across his chest, which is busted open, and blood is dripping down his torso. He also has a bloody nose, which is dripping down onto his chest. Akuma Satsui has a busted, bloody lip, and his left eye is totally swollen shut.
Believe it or not, the two men are still slugging back and forth. Akuma Satsui is still firing knife-edge chops at Jonas Coleman, which are connecting with the chest of the battered fan favorite. Jonas Coleman is answering back with swinging uppercuts, which are landing across the lower jaw of the massive Japanese monster. The difference is, the speed of the shots back and forth seems to have slowed considerably.
The other interesting thing is that it almost appears that after one man lands a shot, he is bracing himself and allowing his opponent to strike him back. It looks like the two superstars are engaged in a bizarre game of one-upmanship, allowing each other to land their best shot and taking the punishment, only to turn around and fire back.
In the background, Dave Dymond is standing among a crowd of security guards, medics, and other assorted SHOOT Project backstage personnel. Dymond has a grim look on his face. He is no longer shouting or trying to interfere, it is as if he knows these two men are trying to settle this issue between them, and nobody – not referees, not security, not cops, or EMT’s, or even Dave Dymond is going to get between them.
Jonas Coleman puts both hands on the chest of Akuma Satsui and shoves him. Satsui flies backward through a set of double doors, and Coleman follows him. The camera follows, and we can see that the two men have brawled their way to the shipping bay in the back of the arena.
We see that the two men are now standing on the loading dock, slugging it out. There is a huge 18 Wheeler with the SHOOT Project logo on the side, parked on one side of the loading dock, but the other is empty. It appears to be at least a six foot drop from the top of the loading dock to the bottom of the cargo bay, and Jonas Coleman and Akuma Satsui are trading chops and punches right on the edge.
Dave Dymond appears in the shot, and scrambles over toward a large stack of crates that are stacked on one side of the loading dock. The crates are chained together with a massive steel chain, exactly like the one Jonas Coleman used to bash Akuma Satsui over the head the last time the two men fought. That time, Coleman used the chain which keeps the ring lashed together when it is loaded in the truck.
This time, Dymond is trying to unlock the chain which is holding the crates together. He grabs a crowbar which is laying on one of the crates, and with a quick twist, the chain pops off the stack of crates. Dymond pulls the chain from the crates, and we can see that it is approximately four or five feet long. Dymond grabs the entire length of chain, and shouts out Akuma Satsui’s name.
Satsui looks up, and Dave Dymond throws the entire length of chain to him. Satsui catches part of it, but Jonas Coleman turned just in time, and he grabs the other end. Coleman starts pulling on the chain, trying to get it away from Satsui. Satsui takes his end of the chain, and starts looping it around the neck of Jonas Coleman!
Jonas Coleman realizes that he is in grave danger, so he gives up his attempt to pull the chain away, and takes his end of the chain, and wraps it around the neck of Akuma Satsui! Now the two men are tangled together in the massive mess of chain, and both have their necks wrapped up in the steel links.
Jonas Coleman keeps his hands around the throat of Akuma Satsui, but he digs down, and goes into a three point stance. As Satsui struggles and tries to choke Coleman, he is being slowly being pushed toward the edge of the loading dock. Satsui must know that he is in danger of being shoved over the edge, but he seems to not care – all he is trying to do is choke Jonas Coleman.
It is hard to imagine why Jonas Coleman is trying to push Akuma Satsui over the edge, as the two men are essentially chained together – if Satsui goes over the edge then Coleman will end up going with him. A frightening drop off the loading dock, down to the concrete and who knows what else – but Coleman keeps pushing.
Sweat is pouring down the face of Jonas Coleman, and we can see him gritting his teeth and pushing forward, inch by painful inch. Satsui is starting to lose his balance. He can’t continue to choke Coleman and keep his balance at the same time, but he will not let go of Coleman – it is almost as if he would rather go over the edge than let go of Jonas Coleman’s throat.
Satsui is now at the very edge of the loading dock, and he is wobbling. Coleman keeps pushing. The camera has zoomed in on the two men, and we can see that Coleman is hissing something at Satsui as he pushes, but we are not close enough to hear what he is saying. Whatever it is that Coleman has said, Satsui rears back his head, and with a crazy look on his face, he laughs.
The two men go over the edge.
There are screams and shouts in the background and a deafening crash. Dave Dymond bellows and runs to the edge of the boarding dock. The EMT’s and security staff are running around, trying to find a way to get down to the two men. As the camera looks over the edge, we see both men – Akuma Satsui and Jonas Coleman. Both men are still entangled in the same chain, and both have landed on a pile of wooden crates at the bottom of the loading dock area. The crates have splintered and smashed, and Coleman and Satsui are laying in the middle of the wreckage, and they are both out cold – unconscious.
The shot returns to Masters and OG in the broadcast position.
Eryk Masters: Fans, I don’t even know how to describe, or what to say about what we just saw.
The Other Guy: It’s like we said earlier, Masters. This is far past the point of a wrestling match, or who wins and who loses. The stakes have been raised so high in this rivalry, and this has gotten so personal – it’s almost unlike any feud we have seen before in SHOOT.
Eryk Masters: All I can say fans, is that we will do our best to keep you up to date on the condition of Jonas Coleman, and Akuma Satsui. Make sure and check SHOOTproject.com this week for all the updates and it goes without saying, we have not seen the last of this issue. Far, far from it.
“Had Enough” by Breaking Benjamin comes alive on the PA, as the Hamburg O2 arena lets it go for Mike Dexter! Dexter walks through the curtain and holds the Laws of Survival Championship up high, indulging the fans in the love they are showing him.
Eryk Masters: Gotta love the reaction for Dex, here. The guy is a standard bearer in the SHOOT Project now.
Other Guy: Have you noticed that your standard bearer hasn’t even bothered to address the psychological warfare at play here, with regards to Adrian Corazon?
Eryk Masters: I HAVE noticed that, and I support his decision completely. I wouldn’t want to play into the tactics that that guy employs, OG. You KNOW I can’t stand him.
Dex high fives some fans on his way to the ring, as Samantha Coil takes the center of the ring to introduce him.
Samantha Coil: Hamburg, Germany… help me welcome to the ring… the SHOOT Project Laws of Survival Champion… MIKE DEXTER!
The crowd pops, as Dexter slides into the ring and takes the microphone from Samantha Coil.
Eryk Masters: Dexter carries that belt with poise, man. He’s a great champion.
Other Guy: I still think he’s ducking Adrian Corazon.
Eryk Masters: Maybe, OG… just maybe… he’ll give some insight into that right now?
The crowd is cheering loudly for Dexter who’s taking a moment to take it all in. He pulls the microphone to his face, allowing the fans to calm down a little bit before speaking.
Mike Dexter: Hamburg, Germany…
The crowd pops!
Mike Dexter: Thank you… thank you for showing me the love of a true champion… a true survivor. Thank you for showing confidence in me, your Laws of Survival Champion!
The crowd pops again!
Mike Dexter: There’s some questions on the minds of the people, and I intend to address those now. I want to talk about Adrian Corazon… Project: SCAR’s black death… the Brutal… the Inhuman… Former SHOOT Project World Heavyweight Champion… Former King of the Iron Fist…
Dexter smirks, as the crowd gives the noise up once more.
Mike Dexter: A lot of formers there, you know? But… eh. I’m not a fan of the psychological stuff. I prefer to keep things simple. I like it phys–
Dexter’s cut off as the sound of an ASP snaps behind him, and before he can react, he’s clipped in the back of the knee, by none other than ADRIAN CORAZON. Dexter goes down in pain, as Corazon looks down on him. Germany’s fans let Corazon have it, booing profusely at the Inhuman. Corazon smirks and cracks Dexter in the face enough to severely limit his resistance, but not completely knock him out.
Other Guy: I guess you MIGHT have been right, Eryk, but it looks like Corazon has other things on his mind!
Corazon brandishes a pair of handcuffs and a thick plastic fastening band. He smirks once more and saunters over to Mike Dexter, attaching the handcuffs to his wrist, and then locking them onto the ring rope. Dexter kicks a bit at Corazon with his feet, but Corazon lays into him with a quick set of right hands, before locking his feet together with the plastic fastener. Then, he retrieves the microphone from the other side of the ring.
Corazon: You like it PHYSICAL, Dexter? DO YOU?
He walks and bends down right in Dexter’s face.
Corazon: How’s THIS for physical? HMM? The cobwebs are starting to clear up a bit, are they not? You are starting to see a bit more… clearly. Understand something… I could have done a lot worse than this… I could have you on one side… your son on the other. It would not have taken me much effort to track him down. You two… you are a beautiful story. Father sacrifices a piece of himself for his son… that is a beautiful, beautiful thing.
Corazon smiles, as he begins pulling weapons out of his trenchcoat pockets. First, an ice pick. Second, a box cutter. Third, and finally… a screwdriver. He places them all at Mike Dexter’s feet, pointing directly at him, in a somewhat symbolic gesture.
Corazon: I am positive by now that you know my affiliations… you know of my proclivities for violence. I see that you are still stitched up from your little operation… still healing from your beautiful moment. How ironic is it that that beautiful moment will leave an ever lasting SCAR?!
The crowd boooooos!!!!
Eryk Masters I SERIOUSLY don’t like where this is headed.
Other Guy: I think you’re going to get all the answers you need here in this little attack, Eryk. I shudder to think what he’s going to do here.
Corazon: In a few moments, Mike Dexter, I am going to cut you open and make you bleed. You do not have a choice in this matter, do you understand?
He waits. He gets in Dexter’s face. Then, he lowers the mic.
”DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!?!”
Corazon: I am done playing fun games with you, Dexter. Now… now…. NOW?!?!”
He smiles and looks out to the crowd.
Corazon: Now, we embody an old SHOOT Project methodology. An old adage…
The crowd boos louder and louder as Mike Dexter’s eyes widen, and he begins to struggle, to no avail. Corazon stuffs a rolled up ace bandage in Dexter’s mouth to silence his resistance, and places a cold, calm hand over his face.
Corazon: Fear not, my new play thing… fear not one thing at all…
His voice goes down to a whisper.
Corazon: …It will all be over soon.
Corazon takes the ice pick… the crowd boos. He places it down. He picks up the box cutter, but is unimpressed by his own choice. Then, he looks towards the screwdriver… oh the screwdriver… he picks that up, and holds it in front of Mike Dexter’s face. Then, he looks at Dexter, and looks towards the camera…
Corazon: If I were you, SHOOT Project… If I were the production crew… I would cut to the back. You’re going to need the extra time.
He smirks into the camera.
Corazon: …there’s about to be a mess.
Dexter screams, as the cameras immediately shift backstage.
Cut to the backstage area. The camera is zoomed in on the closed red door of one of the locker rooms, with the slightly-more-than-faint sound of hardcore gangster music echoing out from door jam. The door is pushed open by the cameraman, and a logo appears at the bottom left hand side of the picture, with ‘DS’ in script, and a silhouette of one of SHOOT Project’s superstars behind it. As the camera enters the room, a massive group of people are using it as a dance floor, with dark lighting and a disco ball hanging over in one of the corners, giving off extra light, obviously cleared out for just a few people to sit down in
As the camera walks to the open room, the people dancing seem to part like the red sea, finally leaving just one man standing alone.
Dan Stein. Dressed to the ‘T’ in a South Pole sweat suit, with a white bandana and his arm in a sling, Stein smirks to the camera as the music begins to get softer.
Dan Stein: That’s right, ladies and gents. Don’t adjust those monitors, Dan ‘The Lights’ Stein is back on RE-VOL-OOOH-TION.
The fans erupt. Stein pauses for a second before continuing on.
Dan Stein: Tonight, for one show only… for now… I’ll be taking my talents to Revolution for a special interview with a former SHOOT Project World Heavyweight Champion, former Revolution champion… Donovan King!
Stein steps to the side, allowing Donovan King to walk up next to him. King checks Stein over, shaking his head.
Donovan King: Man… what’s with the suit?
Stein looks at Donovan, then back to his cousins, who stand on opposite sides of a leather chair, wearing bandanas colored like the Republic of Ireland’s flag. They both give Stein a shrug, as if agreeing with King. Stein sighs, snapping his fingers quickly. The music screeches to a halt. Stein yanks off the button up sweat suit, and tosses the bandana to the side, revealing a traditional short sleeved white button up dress shirt and khaki shorts with flip flops. Stein sighs, cracking his neck as modern day pop music plays, and the dance floor picks back up.
Dan Stein: Yeah, I do feel more comfortable in this.
Donovan shakes his head, chuckling a bit.
Dan Stein: Well, Mr. King… Mr. King, Mr. King… that just sounds… funny. Can I call you something different, I just… that name gives me the heebie jeebies.
Donovan King: …why does Mr. King give you the heebie jeebies?
Stein looks at King for a long, wordless moment.
Dan Stein: You don’t strike me as the kind of guy that would prefer to go by "Mister" anything. Maybe… Sir Donovan of Kingsley or something, fuck if I know. It just does, Man.
Stein laughs shaking his head.
Dan Stein: …but really. What can I call you, besides that. Sally? Deek? Donnie?
King inhales deeply before he laughs to himself.
Donovan King: Donovan. Donnie. King. Whatever works for you.
Stein nods as one of the girls in the room brings the two of them waters on a tray. Stein thanks her, and watches her walk away – never taking his eyes off of the woman.
Dan Stein: Well, super. Donovan it is. I can’t seem to want to call you "Donnie" when you got Thomas Manchester Black cramping your style every where you go – I feel like I’m just perpetuating his annoyance, you know? What’s it like for T-M-B to be every where you are?
Donovan King: Tommy Black an’ me go way back, Dan…so I’m glad you let me…um…come on this show to talk about it. See…look. You, above all others, have to know what it’s like to have a friend close to you. Somebody you respect, somebody you love, somebody you want to see make it in the world above all others…an’ see that man shit on you.
King lets the words sink in.
Donovan King: That’s what Tommy sees in me. A friend who betrayed him an’ walked away. Unlike the guy you know like that, Dan, I hate every piece of me that did that. I did what I had to…but it don’t make it right.
Stein nods, taking a sip of the water using his left hand. Stein slides the bottle into his sling, the gestures with his hand to show how awesome the sling really is.
Dan Stein: Touche’, good sir. But riddle me this – if you know what you did is shitty, and you beat yourself up for it, what gives Thomas – which is a great name, I might add – the right to persecute you for your sins?
Donovan King: What gave you the right to hunt for Cade when you did?
Dan Stein: Now, Donovan, you and I both know that you and Cade Sydal are nothing alike – maybe you will be down the road, but when I set my sights on him, not only was it RIGHT after the man went against everything he ever taught me, but it was also when he thought it was okay for him to do so. You seem to have learned from your mistakes… Sydal’s still making his. But don’t turn this into a me thing, King, this is a you thing. What do YOU think about T-M-B putting the target on YOUR back?
Donovan King: As far as he’s concerned, I drew first blood years ago. He’s waited and now…he waits still. Dude won’t fight. He’s come this far…and he waits. So I struck again. I wanted to…you know…prove a point. Now? Still? That dog don’t hunt, feel me?
Dan Stein: If everyone that had a vendetta with someone was going around smacking people around, I’d be knocked stupid. Hell, even T-M-B thinks I’m a buffoon for ‘walking out’ on his mentor, Matt Kanyon, in OPW. What do you think it’ll take for you and Black to settle this, once and for all?
Donovan King: Did you see the shit he said earlier? I thought him a man of courage…dignity. Instead, that nigga sits his happy ass in some locker room somewhere…waiting. Let him wait, Dan. Let that son of a bitch…
Without warning, King is clubbed from behind, bringing screams to the people around him. Stein is pushed back a bit as the camera pulls back to see THOMAS MANCHESTER BLACK standing over King. He picks King up by his head and RAMS him into the sea of people, causing people to pile in around him. He picks King’s leg up, hooks it quickly, grabbing both of King’s wrists and brings him FACE FIRST TO THE GROUND WITH THE QCS. Black snaps his head to see Stein.
Thomas Manchester Black: Hi there, Danny boy.
Stein looks at TMB, then down to his arm. Immediately, his cousins pop up in front of him, on either side of him, blocking TMB from being able to reach him.
Dan Stein: Hope you don’t mind, they’re… my insurance policy.
Stein looks at DK laying on the ground in the pile of people.
Dan Stein: And why does my show keep getting shat on?!
Black looks down at King, who is unmoving.
Thomas Manchester Black: Nothing…personal, Danny. To quote a greater man than I…your show needed a ratings boost. Now…come on. Ask me a question. Ask me why. Ask me why I’m here. Ask me why I did this after saying I wouldn’t. Come on, Danny. You have a new guest on your show. ASK ME.
Stein looks at TMB, rolling his eyes.
Dan Stein: You’re not going to leave until I ask you, are you?
No response. Stein sighs, but perks up almost immediately.
Dan Stein: Do tell, oh Black one… wait, let me try that again. Do tell, Mr. Black. Why DID you choose MY show to make your FIRST attack on Donovan King?
Thomas Manchester Black: You’ve seen him. Donnie’s always had that kinda…face…that makes you want to just…hit him.
Black’s smirk faded.
Thomas Manchester Black: You tell Donnie when he comes to…he’s got his answer.
Dan Stein: You gave him your answer earlier in the show. You said no.
Thomas Manchester Black: Tell him…I lied.
Black waves to Stein and leaves King there on the ground, stepping over him and exiting the scene.
Stein looks at TMB leave, then to the party that’s at a halt. He shakes his head.
Dan Stein: Well. One of you two put Donovan back on his feet. And for now on YOU STAND IN THE FRONT OF THE ROOM FOR FUCK’S SAKE.
Stein looks at the camera, smiling – not quite his trademark grin though he wants it to be.
Dan Stein: Another exciting edition of… The Midnight Show.
The shot moves to the back, to catch up as Cade Sydal is walking hurriedly through the halls, the SHOOT Project World Title over his left shoulder while his left hand holds onto Cassi Ryan’s, and a blue rolling bag being wheeled by his right hand. Abigail Chase, hot on their trail with a microphone in hand.
Abigail Chase: Cade! Cade! Where are you going?
Without even stopping or looking back, Cade answers over his shoulder into the microphone rudely being thrust into his face.
Cade Sydal: What does it look like I’m doing, Ablivious? I’m leaving.
Abigail Chase: Is it because of Ben Jackman’s confrontation with you, earlier tonight?
This, however, does stop Cade and he turns to glare at Abigail dangerously.
Cade Sydal: Why would you ask me a stupid question like that? Do I…do I look like I’m afraid of Bean Jackstalk? Don’t bother answering that, I know what you’re going to say and the real answer is no. I’m not afraid of him. The truth is, I’m looking ahead. To Dominion, and then Salvation from there where I will make my first of many SHOOT Project World Title defenses.
Cassi Ryan: I…I am though, Abby.
As Cassi speaks up, Cade looks over at her, a look of shock on his face.
Cassi Ryan: Afraid of what Ben said, I mean.
Cade Sydal: Really? Right now, we’re going to have this conversation?
Cassi Ryan: I’m sorry. Just…it made sense, you don’t need to go after him. Its a lose-lose, not a win-win, baby.
Cade looks at Cassi for several moments, still holding her hand, before he turns to look at Abigail Chase again.
Cade Sydal: This interview is over.
He turns back to Cassi and starts to walk again.
Cade Sydal: Let’s go.
Cassi’s arm gets tugged just a little and Cade continues to walk as she takes several quick steps to try and catch up. The couple continue walking down the hall as the shot moves back to ringside.
Other Guy: That’s just like a chick, to go and get scared of a dinosaur!
Eryk Masters: A dinosaur? Do you want to call Ben Jackman a dinosaur to his face, because I can probably get someone to get him to come out here and…
Other Guy: That won’t be necessary! Let’s just calm down now, you know what I’m trying to say here.
Samantha Coil: The following match is scheduled for one fall… and it is a STEEL CAGE MATCH!!
"Poundcake" by Van Halen hits and the ravenous fans of Deutschland explode in a crescendo of… BOOS.
Eryk Masters: What the… wow. I… didn’t expect that kind of reaction to The Stellar One! Not after everything he’s been through!
Other Guy: This is Germany, Eryk. You should remember that The Hierarchy are GODS to the Germans.
Eryk Masters: Okay. This is just gonna be too damn weird.
As Rocky Stellar appears before the crowd, simple pyro explodes at the entrance ramp. While makes his entrance, the fans vehemently shower the Icon with intense boos. They know this man is at war with their hero and their hero’s partner in crime, and they will not stand for it. As Stellar makes his way down the aisle, he can’t help but laugh at the bizarre response he’ been given.
Introducing first… from Chicago, Illinois… weighing in at 265lbs… He is… THE ICON…. ROCKY… STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!
As the Germans continue to boo, Stellar makes his way to the cage, and looks up at the 5 tons of steel before him. Taking a deep breath, Stellar motions for Tony Lorenzo to hold the door open for him. As he steps between the ropes, Stellar confidently marches towards the corner turnbuckle and ascends to the top rope. Pulling himself up to the top of the cage and straddling the very top, he raises an arm out towards the crowd for another wave of concentrated revulsion.
A he swings a leg back down and carefully descends back inside the ring… the lights go out. The fans cheer in excitement as they know what’s coming next.
On the SHOOTron, the tri-colored flag of Germany – in all its black, red, and gold glory – appears front and center with familiar percentage symbols inside of it.
Eryk Masters: This just ruins my life.
Other Guy: Haha… oh my God, Eryk. You’ll be okay.
WE <3 GERMANY!
The audience CHEERS for the sudden show of patronage.
Eryk Masters: UGH. I can’t believe this crowd is falling for their shameful pandering.
WE <3 THE HOFF!
MORE unabashed clapping and appreciation for the blatant sucking up.
Eryk Masters: Fuck off, Eryk Van Warren.
Other Guy: I think you hate him because the "Y" in HIS name is cooler than yours.
The lights slowly fade to dimly lit state.
"The Deutschlandlied", Germany’s National Anthem begins playing over the loud speaker and the crowd absolutely LOSES I. Herr Goeren, Mr. Van Warren, and The Russian Assassin all appear at the top of the stage with their hands to their hearts, showing the utmost respect to the German national anthem.
Samantha Coil: And HIS opponent… um… as it says right here on a note I was handed earlier by Mr. Van Warren… FROM PHILADELPHIA… BY WAY OF… GERMANY?!!
The crowd pops.
Samantha Coil: BY WAY OF GERMANY… he is… Deutschland’s Proudest Cousin… weighing in at 247lbs… this is… X-CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALIBUUUUUUUUUR!!!
The crowd ROARS as all three members of The Hierarchy drape themselves in an extra long German flag. Once they start moving forward, it is clear that Yuri is holding one end, Goeren holds the other, and standing directly in the middle is X-Calibur.
Eryk Masters: Oh God. When will this shit END?!
Even his wrestling pants are reflective of the capacity crowd as they represent the colors of the German flag. Replacing the dragon that usually accompanies X’s ring attire is the Coat of Arms often seen on the official Government of Germany’s flag. From head to toe… X proudly displays his appreciation for Germany.
Eryk Masters: Why is this guy even paying homage to Germany? He’s AMERICAN.
Other Guy: To be fair, X IS like one-one-hundredth German or something.
Eryk Masters: Right. And I’m a direct descendant of Frances Harper!
Upon reaching the ring, all three man stop in their tracks and look up at the steel cage. Stepping forward and out of the clutches of the flag, X looks out at the audience and blows them a simple kiss. They reciprocate this with a roar right back, and inside the ring… Stellar looks like he wants to projectile vomit.
Eryk Masters: This is disgusting beyond words. X couldn’t give a SHIT about these people, and he’s kissing their asses like he’s a national hero!
Looking back at Goeren and Yuri, X nods at them. They nod back, and retreat back down the ramp to the adulation of the Germans. Looking inside the ring at Stellar, X loosens up his shoulders, hands, and neck by cracking them.
Taking a deep breath of his own, X slowly makes his way up the steel steps and stops short of the ring ropes. Looking at Stellar, who has managed to keep his distance and allow X to enter the cage, X shakes his head and yells at the referee to make Stellar get back.
Eryk Masters: For the love of – he IS back!
Other Guy: I don’t know, Stellar DID look like he wanted to jump across the ring and sneak attack X..
Even though he was clearly away from the door and made no indication that he was going to attack X before he could enter, Stellar put his hands up and complied. He backed up even further until he was leaning against the far turnbuckle. Smirking at each other with such hatred, they both knew it was about to be "on".
The cage door shuts… and like X had previously intimated to the officials outside, Stellar charges at his nemesis with a fatal ferocity in his eyes. Unsure of which direction to go in to avoid the charge, X begins pivoting to the left. It proves to be too late, however, and Stellar full-on football tackles X as hard as he can, mashing his up against the steel cage with the force of two-hundred and sixty-five pounds behind him. Slamming awkwardly into the cage wall, the fencing bends outward pretty dangerously with the combined body weight of both competitors slamming into it.
Eryk Masters: Jesus fuck. That cage might not even be able to contain these two!
Other Guy: Yeah… maybe SHOOT should’ve gone with the ole blue cage for this one?
Rolling around on the canvas like a brawl at the high school bus stop, Stellar lays into X with lightning quick punches delivered in insane bunches – only thing missing from this fight is a dust Wile E. Coyote dust cloud. X’s head snaps back against the mat, and Stellar manages to bust open the bottom lip of his opponent the process.
Eryk Masters: You can just FEEL all of the anger coming out of Rocky.
Other Guy: Yeah. This one ain’t gonna be pretty, folks.
Stellar climbs off of X, with X rolling to his feet at the same time. With not a moment’s rest Stellar charges forward at X again, this time spearing him to the mat, away from the cage. Grabbing the back of X’s head, Stellar BASHES his head into the mat like ten pounds of ground beef. Dazed and confused, X tries to throw his hands up to protect himself, but Stellar is ceaseless in his onslaught.
Satisfied enough with X’s prone state, Stellar climbs back up to his feet. He grabs the arm of X and pulls him to his feet as well. Twisting his arm into a short-arm scissors, Stellar pulls back X’s arm back as hard as he can and DROPS him with a massively stiff short-arm lariat. The crowd is completely unhappy with this and begin a certain chant directed solely at the Stellar One.
Eryk Masters: I can’t believe what I’m hearing. This… just isn’t right.
Other Guy: I know… since when did Germans speak English so clearly?!
X on dream street, Stellar drops to his knees beside X as if he’s going for the cover… but he shakes his head as if to say "no"!
With a giant smirk on his face, The Stellar One rips X’s head off the mat… looking out at the audience, Stellar nods his head as if he’s calling for it… and they boo out of retaliation for Stellar trying to spoil the Hierarchy’s homecoming.
Eryk Masters: Is he… is he going for the Stellar Drop already?!
Other Guy: No way. NOBODY has ever put X-Calibur away this quickly before!
Just when Stellar began setting X up for a reverse DDT, X lifts a knee up and smashes the brunt of it right into Stellar’s face, immediately busting his nose open. The crowd ROARS with deafening delight.
Reeling back, Stellar holds his face in agony as X finally manages to gain some reprieve from the vicious offensive blitz. Standing up to his feet, the crowd claps as X smirks at himself. Wrapping his arms around Stellar’s mid-section, X lifts Stellar into the air for a Northern Lights suplex. Bridging the maneuver over into a pin attempt, Lorenzo is right there for the count..
Stellar shoulders out easily, and X has the expression of a man who expected nothing less. Again, the crowd claps at X’s technical prowess, and X takes a bow before the masses.
Eryk Masters: Ugh… despite that pandering shit, it looks like X made an attempt to neutralize Stellar’s emotions with some technical wrestling. Whether or not it actually works remains to be seen. With the manipulation of the crowd tonight, it seems as if X is chock full of psychological tactics tonight.
Other Guy: Despite the man’s recent… indiscretions… X is a world class athlete. He’s a former World Heavyweight Champion in multiple organizations, most notably within the SHOOT Project. Anybody who doubts this man’s capabilities is a damn fool. The Germans are probably right to cheer him on!
As X attempts to bring Stellar to his feet, he is met with strong resistance as Stellar wildly punches at X’s bread basket, effectively doubling him over. Grabbing the back of X’s head and pulling him under his arm into a front chancery, Stellar looks like he’s going for a DDT. But before he snaps to the mat, he shakes his head "no" for the second time, and stands X upright.
"I WANT YOU AWAKE FOR THIS, YOU STUPID FUCKING CUNT!"
Eryk Masters: Well I guess Stellar doesn’t want to put X away just yet. I guess… he wants to torture him?
Other Guy: Not a wise move on Stellar’s part. He had the chance to put him away, and he didn’t. You don’t do that with someone the caliber of Eryk Van Warren. End of story.
Grabbing him by the back of his head, Stellar attempts to ram X’s head into the steel fencing, but X reverses at the last moment and instead throws STELLAR face first into the side of the steel cage – the force of which bounces Stellar back a few feet, dropping him in the center of the cage. ! The crowd pops wildly at Stellar’s undoing, and X simply shakes his head. Almost as if he looked disappointed at Stellar’s emotional display.
Kneeling down beside Stellar, X shouted.
"SO MUCH HEART… WITH SUCH AN EMPTY HEAD!"
Eryk Masters: Looks like X is trying to get under the skin of the Icon… which in itself, is inherently stupid.
Other Guy: Not if he knows Stellar is emotionally compromised in this match.
Mounting Stellar, X HEADBUTTS Stellar directly in the face. He does it again, and again… until he effectively head-butted The Stellar One five or six times. The crowd gasps at the force of the blow and X’s overall viciousness. The audience HATES this and lays into The Stellar One with more derogatory chants.
Eryk Masters: That’s…. ugh. Sickening. Just SICKENING.
Other Guy: If Stellar’s nose wasn’t broken before, it sure as shit is now!
Stellar is seemingly unconscious and blood begins oozing out from his nose. X positions himself to make a simple lateral cover, and the audience LOVES it.
THR- Stellar shoulders out a little slower than the last time, much to the chagrin of the capacity crowd.
With Stellar dazed from the vicious head-butts, X brings the Icon to his feet and whips him into the ropes. On the rebound, X catches Stellar with a release overhead belly-to-belly that sends Stellar harshly into the side of the steel cage, landing dangerously on his head. The crowd "OOOOOH’S" with concern as Stellar holds the back of his neck.
Eryk Masters: Just LISTEN to this crowd!! I don’t get it!!
Other Guy: Look at X. He LOVES this!
As the camera zooms in for a sickening close-up of Stellar’s broken nose, X takes the opportunity to hold out his arms towards the audience as if to say, "THIS IS THE BEST HE CAN DO?!". The crowd’s imminent exaltation is all the reaction he needed to laugh vigorously like a callous executioner watching his victim’s beheaded frame flop to the mat.
Eryk Masters: SHIT… Stellar already has numerous problems with his head after the recent beatings by the Hierarchy and he doesn’t need neck problems on top of it.
Other Guy: Stellar’s nose looks really bad right now. Look at the bridge – his cartilage is all fucked up.
Stellar still climbs to his feet, despite being dumped on his neck. X looks a little surprised by this, and taunts the Icon with some insults and demeaning gestures. Grabbing Stellar by the back of the head, X snap mares Stellar onto the mat. Driving a knee into his back, X balances himself on his other knee, while taking both hands and clawing at Stellar’s broken nose.
Eryk Masters: Oh he’s not about to do what I think he’s about to do..?
Squeezing the bridge of Stellar’s nose as hard as he can with one hand, X tries to fish-hook Stellar’s cheek with his other hand. The vile "submission hold" garners bloodthirsty shouts of approval from the capacity crowd, and Stellar screams out in agony. Lorenzo asks Stellar if he wishes to give it up, but Stellar vehemently refuses.
Other Guy: Sure looks like it, E… yuck.
Blood POURS down Stellar’s face as he squeezes the blood out from his smashed cartilage, and from the fish hooking of his cheek he invites the blood to pour freely into Stellar’s own mouth. The soft gags and sickening sputters signify that Stellar is choking on his own blood.
Eryk Masters: My God… STOP THIS.
Other Guy: No way. You think Stellar wants this match to stop? He doesn’t care what he has to go through… he wants X’s ass in this match, and if Lorenzo stops it now Stellar will have his head.
Eryk Masters: It’s not really about what Stellar wants at this juncture, though. It’s about his HEALTH, OG.
As Stellar continues to choke and spit out his own blood, X grows bored of this physically torturous mechanism he’s crafted. As Stellar lay on the mat, wiping his face from the blood, X hooks a leg. Lorenzo is there with a merciful count. The crowd counts along with great excitement…
THR- Stellar kicks out, and X slams his hands on the mat out of pure frustration.
X: JUST STAY THE FUCK DOWN YOU STUPID FUCKING FUCK!!
Eryk Masters: And now X looks psychologically deterred.
Bringing Stellar back to his feet, X throws a hard right directly into Stellar’s broken nose. Reeling him back, X goes in for another. Stellar fights through the unimaginable pain, though, and KICKS X squarely in the testicles. The audience JEERS like crazy, and X’s eyes go wide with cock-shock.
Eryk Masters: SHIT. Well, since we can’t exactly afford the benefits of sounds effects here in the SHOOT Project , I’ll do y’all a favor and just say… DING!
Other Guy: I don’t know which pop was louder… The Hierarchy’s entrance of X’s ball bag!
X falls back to the mat, completely taken for surprise by Stellar’s dirty tactics. Through the gelatinous blood that has caked his nose, a smirk forms on the face of the Stellar One. Looking down at X’s prone state, Stellar lifts The Legendary One’s legs up, spreads them eagle, and NAILS X right in the The Legendary Dick with a blatant downward thrusting foot-stomp.
"MY FUCKING BALLS!!!"
Some of the audience throws trash towards the ring, completely incensed that The Stellar One would have the AUDACITY to cheat against one of the Hierarchy’s heroes.
Eryk Masters: I think his balls hurt, OG.
Other Guy: Really? What gave it away? Him screaming "MY FUCKING BALLS!", or the acorn-like objects he’s spitting out onto the mat?
Mounting X, Stellar drives stiff, calculated shots right into X’s lip, opening up the small cut he gave him earlier until it became a large gash. Satisfied with the blood flowing freely from his lip, Stellar dismounts the X-Man and brings him to his feet. One backhand chop to the face – more specifically, his lip, and X is sent reeling into the cage. The crowd is ready to riot.
Guiding X back to his feet. Stellar, takes X by the back of the head and SMASHES him into the side of the cage. Raking his face into the steel, Stellar grinds his flesh in a back and forth motion, hoping to catch some skin on an uneven spur of the fencing. He succeeds in doing precisely that, and X’s forehead becomes a crimson mess. Ripping him back from the cage, X holds his busted open forehead. Stellar looks out at the capacity crowd and gives a primal war cry. They basically tell him to eat shit and die.
Lifting X to his feet, he scoops X up into a body slam position… but instead of slamming him to the mat Stellar pushes X’s body forehead, causing his feet to land on the mat. Holding X’s head in position for a reverse DDT, Stellar winks at the camera and delivers one of his famous finishing maneuvers with scintillating effect.
Eryk Masters: STELLAR DROP!
Other Guy: Lord… he hit it with flush execution, too. X is done.
All of a sudden, the fans EXPLODE like Hulk just slammed Andre as Azrael Goeren SPRINTS down to the ring. Yuri is pretty far behind him, though, as the behemoth Russian Assassin slowly makes his way down the ring with a pair of bolt cutters.
Eryk Masters: DAMMIT… not again….
Stellar knows what is awaiting him, and as he looks directly at Goeren, who frantically pounds the steel cage, begging the Stellar One to stop. Stellar looks out at Goeren and shouts, "WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR, BITCH?! YOUR FANS ARE WAITING!", and promptly lifts X’s flimsy frame up from the mat, setting him up in position for a suplex. Seconds later, in one fluid motion, he transitions into a straight dropping piledriver, completing his patented version of the screwdriver.
Eryk Masters: HOLY SHIT!!! STELLAR DRIVER!!!
Other Guy: I haven’t seen that in years… LOOK!! Goeren is climbing the cage!!
Looking down at X, Stellar smiles and shakes his head. Looking up at Goeren, Stellar judges how long he has before Goeren makes it to him before he can put away X. Bringing X’s limp body into an upright position one more time… Stellar hooks X’s head in a front-facelock with his right arm, grabs X’s leg with his left arm, and HEAVES Mr. Van Warren into the air for a fisherman’s suplex. Slamming him down to the canvas with the bridge, the fans count along with great anticipation, expecting Goeren to make the save as he begins to scale over the cage.
Goeren drops carefully to the middle of the top rope, using the cage for balance.
Turning around, Goeren measures up Stellar.
THREE- NO! GOEREN DELIVERS A DIVING HEAD-BUTT INTO STELLAR’S ABDOMEN!
Eryk Masters: SON OF A BITCH!! DAMN THAT MAN!! DAMN HIM!!!
Fans all across the SHOOT Epicenter are lost in joyous abandon with Goeren’s epic save. Stellar, meanwhile, has gotten up to his feet, and as soon as Goeren is up from his diving head-butt, Stellar greets him with a warm head-butt of his own, smashing Goeren’s nose like X had smashed his own!
Other Guy: LOOK AT YURI!
It doesn’t take much effort for the gargantuan of a man to cut through the lock that kept the chains tying the door shut in place. Carefully removing the chains around the door like a surgeon, he rips the door open with brute force.
With Goeren bleeding from his nose now, Stellar takes this opportunity to bash his face into the side of the steel, grinding his flesh against the steel like he had previously done to X. X, meanwhile, who is a bleeding mess, is completely sprawled out on the mat like a man who got hit by a raging bull.
Eryk Masters: Please… not like this…
Yuri sees this and hunkers down in between the ropes and stretches as far as he can into the ring. With great ease, Yuri grabs a hold of X’s hand and pulls him towards the cage door.
Stellar sees this, and turns his attention to X.
Goeren makes a last ditch effort and wraps his body around Stellar’s lower extremities like a German octopus, tripping up the Stellar One and causing him to fall forward on the mat. Once again, the fans EXPLOE. Reaching towards X’s foot, Stellar’s hand comes up short by mere inches as Yuri pulls X the rest of the way through the door, dumping his unconscious body to the outside mat.
Lorenzo calls for the bell. Germany just about knocks down the barricade as The Hierarchy steals the victory away from Stellar.
Eryk Masters: No…. tell me that didn’t just happen.
Other Guy: Um, I think it did?
Samantha Coil: Your winner of this match by escape… at a time of 24 minutes and 54 seconds…. X-CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALIBUUUUUUUUUUUUUUR!!!
Other Guy: Folks, we are out of time! For Eryk Masters, I’m Other Guy…
Eryk Masters: Ridiculous…
Other Guy: See you at Dominion!